Having worked in a field that had a high rate of loss of life I understand the toll that takes on a person. As professionals we were counseled and had opportunity to enhance our understanding and compassion. We were taught how to choose our words wisely and to think of how they affect others. So in my search for an assisted living situation for mom I am surprised at the things that have been said to me. More than once I have heard, "Well we don't have an opening now but we do have two on hospice....." or "Well sometimes we bring them in kicking and screaming but they get used to it". Today a private home caregiver said mom would need to buy her own diapers. I explained that she was not incontinent. He then replied, "Well it's our experience once they are here they need diapers within two weeks". Seriously did he think that was a selling point? People are so callous, and refer to the elderly with a collective "they" followed by unflattering comments. I'm so discouraged in my search.