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As far as telling your child that they can't stay with Gma anymore. My MIL was diagnosed with dementia when the same child was 9. Since my FIL was capable we were able to continue letting him stay with her and ease him into the knowledge that Gma would not be able to handle this situation anymore.
Of course each child is different and every parent has to gauge what is best for their own child. Good luck!
I know that they often give baby dolls to people in Alzheimer's units to hold and it brings them comfort and peace. The disease is such a horrible thing - my own mother is in a nursing home because I was no longer able to care for her. If you can bring your mother a little bit of happiness safely, no matter how brief and even if she can't remember, I say to do it. My heart truly goes out to you on this. I hope my advice makes sense. I do believe if you are right beside her ready to take over in an instant, that you could let her hold the baby.
How does being forgetful, speaking slower, moving slower, wandering or being unable to do math, cook and other complex functions (these being the Alzheimer's symptoms of my dad and most other persons with AD) make them any kind of threat to young kids?
Are commenters really expressing a fear of exposing kids to basically a somewhat mentally-challenged/disabled person that is the issue?
...but it depends on the person with AD and if the person, who doesn't have the disease, thinks whether or not it's okay for the person with AD
to handle the baby. Take precautions if you do decide it is okay.
As long as there is someone watching how the person, who has Alzheimer's, interacts with the baby (have that person sit right next to him/her) so if anything happens, the baby can be safe at all times.
My MIL, as long as she was sitting in a chair with pillows all around her and someone watching her and the baby, fed the ggd and sang to it.
If it had been me, I would have been hesitant to put the baby in her arms.
...but my SIL, the baby's grandmother, put pillows all around her and baby
and she was fine. Now as for changing baby's diapers, no, that responsibility goes to someone younger. She got to hold the girl's baby (the girl that is like a daughter to her), only for a short time.
Now, if you know they aren't having a good day, then I definitely would say no. Let the mother keep the baby in her arms while ggm or whatever relation she happens to be, plays with him/her.
If the baby is wiggly, I would definitely say no.
The questioner mentions the person has never shown any abusive type of behavior. So one must consider each case differently.
I can say that my nephew 9 y.o. and niece 7 y.o. had absolutely no problem playing in the living room with my 85 y.o. father with Alzheimer's sitting on the lounger, reading his paper, snoozing, or drifting off. Occasionally, he would wander over to see what they were doing, and vice versa. Mom or other adults were either in the living room or kitchen adjacent.
They knew he was forgetful, not so talkative, etc., and actually dealt with it better than most adults. They just accepted and accommodated him as needed. The only problem I can recall is when grandpa kept taking photos of my niece playing (we figure it was his coping mechanism to remember), and she got irritated by it. But mom talked to her about being patient and understanding, a teachable moment as they say.
Alzheimer's is not contagious, it doesn't automatically mean violent or abusive behavior, and it's not scary if understood. There is enough discrimination in this world, let's not let ignorance add another category.
If the question is whether a person with Alzheimer's should take care of and supervise kids, then clearly that is no.
Well, you got your answer. Better safe than sorry, don't you think?
Also depends on the people involved, some kids are scared of old people and sometimes elderly people are nervous around kids.
Once again-good wishes~~
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Best to you and your family,
And you don't say what stage of Alzheimer's obviously.