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I’m hoping someone might share what to expect for my mom. She is 90 and has high blood pressure with newly diagnosed stage 4 kidney disease . She has recently lost control of her bladder and bowels and is feeling tired and weak . Her appetite is ok but she is having a difficult time using her computer which she loves and focusing on reading . Tia

I’m having a hard time navigating this new format . Years ago ( caring for in-laws) I’d have to register and got an email when I got an answer .
anyway thank you all for your answers. As far as seeing her doctors it has been very frustrating. You get the switch board and leave a message and must wait for them to call you back. It sometimes takes 48 hours. I guess we all want to know what is going on with our parent, their prognosis, and even exact day of their death so we can figure out the finances and what we are going to be in for , but that is not how this plays out. I can not control this and am going to have to learn to accept each day as it comes.
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Reply to Sorrynotsorry
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My mom had it for 2 years, controled along with diabetes and daily insulin. The stage 4 did not get any worse and she passed from weakness related to not taking in enough calories on her own. Years ago she was advised and she also chose not for dialysis which is not recommended por 90 year olds.
This past year, we opted to not seeking specialists and did not push her to eat beyond what she could enjoy. My mom passed at age 98. Your mom may be at that stage that her body is shutting down. You might want to seek the advice of a gerantologist to see what should be treated and what could be left alone. The trick here is to keep her happy and comfortable.
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Reply to MACinCT
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I don't know specifics of the disease, but an elderly cousin (91) was recently diagnosed with stage 4 kidney disease and has opted for hospice instead of further treatment.
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Reply to MJ1929
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Yes I just read that this means the kidneys are very damaged. Dialysis would be the next step but not sure how that would effect a 90 yr old. My 70 year old friend chose to stop his 3x a week. Its very hard on your system. What is happening is the kidney is not able to filtrate the blood going thru it so the toxins build up in blood stream. These toxin will effect Mom's brain. She may show Dementia like symtoms. What I read says high blood pressure can cause this problem or the problem can cause high blood pressure.

You really need to discuss this with her doctor.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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Speak with your Mom's doctor. First of all you will pass the hurdle of dialysis, if you have not already. Does your Mom want this? I do not and my Advanced Directive states that clearly. It is exhausting. One day weekly, all the problems with access, feeling OK a day or two and then back to feeling exhausted and needing it again. It is a crucible for the elderly to endure. Be certain you know whether she would want to do this.
Again, crucial is that you (I assume POA for health care) speak with MD about diagnosis and prognosis. It may be time to call in hospice. Kidneys are one of the big three. Heart, lungs, kidneys all needed for life and once one system begins to cave the others follow like dominos.
I am sorry for this diagnosis. Your doctor is your best guide. Many, however, make promises about dialysis that are not realistic, especially at the end of life, and in my opinion it is a "heroic measure" at this stage of life.
I wish you the best. I would begin the think clearly and realistically now about the fact that end of life is on the doorstep, and how best to make this remaining time quality time, pain free as you can make it.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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I don’t know the answer but stick around so others can help. I am so sorry that you are struggling with this situation. Take care.
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Reply to NeedHelpWithMom
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