Anyone tried dating while being a caregiver?

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I swore never to bring someone into my life. Now I found him and Mom is too much. He has been very supportive.. and great with talking to my mother as I have nothing to talk to her about anymore..in fact the sound of her voice is like nails on a board to me. he came in knowing my hands were full and didn't seem to care. but its my attitude and negative thoughts that my life is just one burden after another and I dont see positive things happening in the future,,im so worried about being broke,whats going to happen to me (mom and I live in her house ) am I ever going to get a decent job after this,, etc,, I
I m afraid I may be just pushing him away when I say that he'd be better off with someone who is free and doesn't have such a heavy burden.. it makesme almost hate my mother for holding me back from being happy

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my husband had loads of affairs/one nights/whatevers but not always with women so I am afraid even with the almighty himslef I wouldn't have taken him back. Forgiven now though and all is well we live happily apart
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Francis only you can decide what I meant by his tool belt! sniggers
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Wait a minute, Jude, you are talking about his actual tool belt, right?? Yikes.
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LOL Jude, Amen.
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Oh youre all far too nice I would have cut off his tool belt completely - and learned DIY!!!!!
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I responded before I saw some of the updates and other opinions. I have to agree that they both are "at fault", and if that is nature's course, you may be dodging a BIG bullet... a blessing in disguise. Let them have eachother..and he can hang his toolbelt elsewhere...but you should retain house improvement rights when needed ;) Free of charge of course.
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I think you should invite them both over to your house for dinner, then take off on your own either with another friend or "hot date"... ask them to mind Mom while you're out for awhile... Kidding, that scene popped into my head like the commercial where the couple drops the baby off at mom and dads then the baby's parents take off..but...evil grin here...it just maaaayyy work. We're all friends here, right?? ;) Women, can't live with them, can't shoot em. (disclaimer: I don't intend on, nor have I ever shot anyone) And I'm a straight woman here talking, where is the loyalty? Why do women have to be so competitive with eachother?? ARGH..it totally drives me nuts. And excuse me, and for WHAT? A guy??? Come on! Sorry for the rant. All things being said, you'll have to take the open hand approach, love and let go freely.
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Sanity before you kick him out make sure you use his toothbrush to clean out the commode and under the rim of the toilet - not that I am remotely vindictive of course. And if you do decide to make him one last meal make sure they are individual pies and that his contains something like I and love and you canned dog food...dont worry they use human grade ingredients!!!!!!! And some wonder why noone crosses me ....or why I am still single!!!!! It would have to be a brave man wouldnt it?
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oh and CountryMouse your are so right!!!!
She could have called and said Id like to make dinner or treat to drinks for B. for all the work he's done would you mind even though she paid him ???? but she didn't.
but then again he should have thought about his actions.. cause now Im going to wonder where he is spending his free time if its not ice fishing or working..
Its been a long week!!! getting my hair cut today.. Just maybe I'll be able to think more clearly Ha !! ha !
As he says 90% of my problem thinking are between my ears !!! and I cant think of 1000 scenarios that night. ( I tend to way over think things a lot )
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thanks ladies !!!
yes its a tough spot. Im still upset with him and he knows it. I am letting him make the next moves...this literally could be a game changer in what ever it is that we are doing . I just value what weve had threw the years and I want to protect it.. He is floundering with all the changes in his life the past year. Im hoping when he gets back to real job he will get his head in the game...I need help with this house (water in the basement soon and lawn will need mowing..and if it comes to him doing that in lieu of storage fee and we just greet and be polite , I may just have to grin and bare it. I don't have $ to hire someone. and YES he has been a bright light on a daily basis as Im home all day, seeing him has given me things to look forward to.
I have not spoken to her. ( but my daughter borrowed her suit case for next week so I will have to at some point)
but she doesn't know boundaries.. she over stepped a few years ago when my ex husband was in ICU ( almost died from drinking) the same week she asked to take my daughter to lunch with hers.. WELL it turned out to be just her and mine.. She proceed to talk to her about AA meetings and wanted take her. Not her place!!! it was bad enough he was in ICU nobody wasn't talking about anything my poor kid had enough with school she was 14? So I flipped didn't speak to her for 5 years. then one day we bumped into each other ironically our daughters were getting wisdom teethe out .. same day same office. same DR.
and here we are today .
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