Anyone have to move their parent out of an ALF?

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I am posting this in burnout as this is as stressful as it was when she lived with me. So I moved my mother to an ALF about a year and a half ago. Her funds are not lasting as long as I planned out. To keep her there I'd have to chip in $1k a month, which is a lot. In addition, it is getting tougher and tougher for her to walk to the dining room which they require and she is not capable of managing a wheelchair.


She does not qualify for Medicaid, she's just above the limits in our state.


Did anyone take their parent back in? I just do not think I can do that, again.


I was going to consult a lawyer as I read it may be possible to put her SS and/or pension into a trust to be used towards her care but it would also put her at the income level to qualify for Medicaid and then I could move her to a nursing home.


Any advice, recommendations would be appreciated.

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Yes, consult an eldercare lawyer. There may be options. There is something called “pooled income trust” that might help. But there are downsides.
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Reply to Spinster
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The other thing you may want to think about is putting your mom in a long term care facility -- Skilled Nursing Facility -- they operate differently than Assisted Living and Medicaid works a little differently. Just a thought.
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Reply to ArtMom58
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Hi there, so very sorry you are dealing with this.
while I do not have this exact experience, I would strongly suggest you do as you said and seek the advice of an elder care attorney and see what all your options are.
not judging your situation or relationship with your mom, but I would make bringing her back to your house the absolute LAST resort, I do know how it is to be in the situation where you don’t have enough to make it, but just enough not to qualify for help...
sorry I don’t have more helpful info but I think you are on he right path to find out, keep us posted
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Reply to sidelined
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I'd get all the information and advice from the professionals. I learned that sometimes, I was told things were a certain way and then later, I discovered that things were a little different, because, my LO's situation was different. And, laws and resources vary by state. In my state, there were state funds to help those who qualified by need (doctor's form) and financially for AL and MC. I also found that people who are disabled or who have dementia may qualify for benefits that others don't. And, that if someone needs a special care unit, like dementia, they may have a higher income threshold than for a regular AL So, there are many things that could come into play. So, I'd get a professional to actually make sure of the situation, before giving up on her qualifying.
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Reply to Sunnygirl1
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Some MC facilities accept Medicaid, but it's limited. I would strongly suggest you see an Elder Care Lawyer who specifically specializes in Medicaid. There are ways for Medicaid to pay, but there will likely be a waiting time once you apply. There are calculations and strategies for this, but each case is different. The sooner you see a ECL, the better.
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Reply to ArtMom58
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I understand. To tell the truth, my mother probably would have qualified for AL when I was first looking at facilities, but there were none close by. The only one was more like a resort than a facility with a price to match. Mom was always a paranoid recluse and that would have been a big waste of money to put her there.

This Medicaid Waiver thing is very confusing and I wish I’d enlisted the help of an attorney.

Good luck. I hope it all works out for you and Mom.
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Reply to Ahmijoy
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Hi JoAnn, agree she needs the 24/7 now (it was different when I first moved her to ALF). I will have to look for medicaid facilities that fit her needs. She doesn't need memory care.
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Reply to Logan179
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Do Memory cares except Medicaid? If not, they will probably cost more.

From what you post Mom really needs 24/7 care. I think a lawyer versed in Medicaid would be a good idea. Some states have a Miller trust where the overage can be put there every month. I think it reverts to Medicaid upon death.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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Ahmijoy, thank you. That is what I had read about, the Miller Trust. The attorney that drew up the POA handles elder law also, so my plan was to meet with them.

I did have her assessed before she was placed in the assisted living facility, that is mandatory. So it is not that she wasn't placed properly, she has just deteriorated, and at the time it was determined she didn't need to be in a NH. In addition, we live in a pay down state for medicaid. Basically she has to exhaust her savings before we could do the trust.

Thanks again.
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Reply to Logan179
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Ahmijoy, thank you. That is what I had read about, the Miller Trust. The attorney that drew up the POA handles elder law also, so my plan was to meet with them.

I did have her assessed before she was placed in the assisted living facility, that is mandatory. So it is not that she wasn't placed properly, she has just deteriorated, and at the time it was determined she didn't need to be in a NH. In addition, we live in a pay down state for medicaid. Basically she has to exhaust her savings before we could do the trust.

Thanks again.
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