My husband’s Mom lives with us. I did sign up for this. But never in a million years did I think I would be this unhappy about it 3 years later. No privacy, she is always home, even days when I just want to come home and be alone to play music, clean or just sit and read....she is here. My husband and I had only been married 2 years when we agreed to this arrangement. We were both in our late 40’s so we are not young people. Mom was living alone in the home my husband grew up in. Her house was falling apart. Roof, floors, walls etc. She had been wanting to sign the property over to my husband for a few years. So we agreed to do this and build a new house with an in law apartment for her. We found after researching we could not afford the mortgage for this project. The in law apartment was too much. She had agreed to pay rent to us towards mortgage and taxes (rent) but we needed to be sure we could afford it on our own in case one day we didn’t have her to help. We went with an extra large 3 bedroom ranch. Everything on one floor to make it easier for her (she is 75). Her bedroom is on one end of the house and ours the other, 2 bathrooms etc. She had stated to us on many many occasions it would be a great financial arrangement for both of us. She said she would not have to pay for repairs and the cost to heat her fallen down house and we will be able to build up savings by her helping us. Yes, we got the property from her and she gained a brand new home. Sounds great doesn’t it? Not so much. One week after living here she said to us “I have decided not to pay rent, you two will make out better this way” I had no idea what she was talking about. We were both just dumbfounded. I said nothing because it isn’t my mom. My husband didn’t say anything and wanted to see what she meant by that. Well she pays the oil to heat our home. That cost averages about 60 dollars a month. She buys groceries. BUT, she buys the cheapest most disgusting things that we do not like. She will buy anything to save a buck. So we end up buying groceries anyway. We have told her we do not like the stuff she buys but she continues. So now in my opinion she pays 60 a month to live here. I appreciate that she gave us the land (worth approx. 35,000) but when is enough enough? We have surpassed that 35,000 to keep a roof, cable (that she loves tv and WiFi), water bill (that she uses water to shower and do laundry), electricity (that she cooks good things all the time to take to Bingo) . She goes to Bingo 4 nights a week and brags about her winnings. When she loses , that is a different story. We get a moody pouting mom at that point. So she's living a wonderful carefree life. But she is ALWAYS complaining to others that she “has no money” and hates being broke. This woman gets 2300 a month. Her bills consist of 200 a month for health insurance and about 130 for prescriptions. No car payment, no nothing! It all goes to BINGO! I am so frustrated and angry. I do not take it out on my husband (he is on the same page as me) but it does wear on both of our moods with each other. Now the easy thing would be to tell her she needs to get her own place (her health is fine and she can live alone) but my husband out of respect for his Dad (that is deceased) doesn’t feel that is respectful to his dad or his mother to do that. So he would rather suffer and live this way. I do not want to come home from work at all anymore. I find things to do not to come home until my husband is home, we do not have friends over (no privacy), no alone time, she knows all of our business, we cant discuss anything because she is always listening, we do not have a carefree schedule anymore. We did not sign up for care taking. This was strictly a live in situation that was financially going to be great for all of us. So far we suffer and she gets all the benefits. We also found out she has a gambling problem to boot! So now we know where her money goes. So she is living care free and we are lucky to be able to afford to go out to eat once a month. I am very angry and bitter about this. I am not happy at all anymore. I love my husband with all my heart and he does me as well. But this living arrangement is hurting us. There really is no advice any of you can give me because I know this is not going to change. I just wanted to know if there was anyone else here that has a parent with them and how it works out. I am looking for more of coping skills because I can’t change it.