As my dad descends more and more into dementia and my mom into alcoholism, I can only remember the last decade, which has been heartache. These two miserable people are not the people who raised me, and our happy family is a distant memory. I find the old photos very odd and even disturbing - I guess especially that, because of my mom's alcoholism, she has been unable to care for (or about) my dad in years. It's as ugly as things can get. In a strange way it makes me feel good to run the old photos into the shredder. I think it's because I am anxious to look forward and grab onto the rest of my life. I am anxious to enjoy MY future and hoping there is one out there for me when these two are gone. I know, weird, right?

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I did the same thing one time, when my mom starting showing strong dementia decline and it was so much affected my family that one time I just put some her and family photos to fire....then after my brother completely neglected our mom who was in a hospital and then in rehab, I did the same things with his and her photos together....its very hard to be lonely caregiver especially when our parents become completely different persons....My father died of cancer, but his mind was sharp to the last day, and watching my mom declining with every day and my inability to help this and even inability to take her home in such condition - that's probably what led to crushing the photos , of course not all of them, but, if it gives you some relieve, then why not....
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Thank you Eyerishlass. It started with me taking photos off the walls & such because they became too painful and weird to look at. But then I found it was a good way to release my anger by running them through our home office shredder. I am an only child and my parents moved me all the way across the country, away from all family, when I was little. I feel somewhat of an "orphan" now and I am anxious to put my past far behind and start anew. I am wondering if this is a normal feeling for someone dealing with dementia within the family.
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No, it's not weird. Looking at old photos can be emotional. When I look at photos of my parents I gaze into their faces to see if I can find any trace of what's to come. But of course I can't because no one knew at that time how things would turn out.

Please don't destroy your photos. There may come a time when you will regret it. Put them away somewhere in a box and don't look at them right now. If, in the future, you'd like to look at them your heart will break knowing that they're gone. And while you may want to destroy them now you will change over time and you may not feel the same way as you do now.
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