My siblings only visit my dad on holidays and one even said it would be a "burden" for them to visit him once a week. How can I get them to visit more often?

It's the reckoning, I loved that when it was said in "Tombstone" cause it really is.

Was your mom glad to see her, and did she know who she was? Did you guys talk about her visit.

Which brings me to another question. I use to talk about my sister to my mom, after she got sick. Then one day I realized I was putting too much xtra stress on mom and I stopped. Did you ever do that?

She does not remember anything even right after it happens. I seldom mention The Two Deadbeats, except if there is a photo mom touches, then I'll say their names.

Mom didn't seem to know who she was, though sister was friendly...and Mom will kiss just about anyone off the street. Mom was taking a nap when sister arrived, and sister visited at bedside. I ran quickly to the bank machine and came back, Mom was having a little fit, anxious about this stranger here trying to hold her hand. Anyway, she was blithering about letting her sleep, and then blithered in her sleep.

I rarely mention the two deadbeats, though admit I let out a few insults when things get rough around there. the "nobody ever helps me" rant, but even then I don't mention their names. They are NO THINGS to me now.

I often reinforce the names and photos of the supportive relatives, recycle their greeting cards with bogus new envelopes and phoney stamps. For the two good nieces, we sometimes visit via webcam.

Oh, of course I have a blog about that from a few weeks ago.,..

http://whendoesthegladstart.blogspot.com/2010/02/webcam-moms-favorite-video-user-herself.html

Well you can't pick your family, its a good job we can pick our friends. And you got all of us.

There is such a document with the courts...that you relinquish all to a court apointed guardianship.

There is nothing you can do except not to say I told you so when the person passes away and it usually does not bother the parent if the adult children do not come around if they like that child they will forgive them it is the caregiver that usually gets steped all over-I see it in my family I have talked to one brother so much about visiting our Mother and now I just save my breath.

Wonder how typical our experiences are out there with the other 47 million family caregivers.

Seems like my sister doesn't want me to come around however my mom does. Oh the care giver seems to be bothered a bit by my visits as well but who really cares. Problem with that is when you stay away for a while those darn care givers will treat your loved ones any kind of way. Not us children, I'm talking about the paid "help".

Can you tell I'm a little bothered by my moms care giver?

i am going thru the samething. my father is 81 yrs old and in a nursing home. the sweetest man in the world. It is only me and my sister and 3 of the grandchildren are grown. I am the only one that wants and cares enough to visit several times a week to let him know just because he is elderly and in a nursing home that i still love him and think of him. It hurts me so bad when he ask about why my sister doesnt come and when i try to talk to her she gets mad. I dont understand. I know how you feel.