Follow
Share

I am looking to hire a live in for my mother with alzheimers who was placed on hospice and is bedridden from a fall. We live in NYC. It is daunting because while many people want to offer the names of agencies, I don't know how to look up reviews to see if they are good or not.


I'm sure many people have been in this situation and any guidance or suggestions would be appreciated.

Find Care & Housing
My LO can't be convinced to have more in-home care than a few hours a day due to feeling a loss of privacy. You may feel this too. Although we've been extremely happy with Visiting Angels in south FL, I can't vouch for any single franchise as they are all owned by different people. I concur with the seasoned commenters below who recommend transitioning to a NH. Sometimes making this decision seems so hard because we've spent many years assuming we would manage things a certain way (in a perfect world). It can be hard to let go of that. Wishing you peace in the solution.
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to Geaton777
Report
Lileesa Jul 27, 2019
I have been caring for my mother alone for 2 years now but now that she is bedridden her care needs have grown quite a bit. She has had a daytime aide and is comfortable with her so I don't believe she will have a problem with caregivers. She has only been home from the hospital and been on "hospice" for 1 week now so my mind is in a tizzy all over the place.

Thank you for taking the time to reply. NH may be the answer but it is difficult to consider.
(0)
Report
My husband had cancer and dementia, I worked and had a care taker for him in the home, for may be a month. It was not working, I place him in one of our vacant rentals, turnkey, and hired 24/7 nursing care, lasted 2 months, he was getting violent. Then to hospice. Had I to do it over, there is no way that I would do any type of home care, although, I ran background checks on the caretakers, checked references, when the caretaker showed up, I swear it was her twin sister, not the person I hired. I suggest considering to place her in a NH, if you can afford at home hospice, you can afford to place her in a excellent home.
Helpful Answer (3)
Reply to DollyMe
Report
Lileesa Jul 27, 2019
Thank you again Dolly. There really is no easy answer to vetting aides. I contacted one agency which does not accept medicaid (private pay only) who claims they are more responsive and have 'better' aides that are paid more. At least they allow you to meet the aide before placement in your home. Is it correct that normally an agency just sends someone to your door that you haven't met beforehand?

Who knows? It feels like everyone in the aide industry is a salesperson and the visiting nurses just want to fill out their forms and get to the next case.. sigh..

I'm confused about this too. Are there separate "homes" for hospice care? or is it all just "nursing homes"?
(0)
Report
Lieesa, I realize that having a "live-in aide" sounds like the right thing, it sometimes isn't. The live-in aide caring for a person who has Alzheimer's will be doing the job of 3-shifts of caregivers each and every day, without a break. That aide will burn out very quickly, and now you are back to square one.

As for reviews of professional caregiving agencies, just remember when you read a negative review, there are two sides to every story. A minor infraction can be blown up to major drama on a review.

I had called a caregiving agency who advertises nationally on TV, and was also one of many names on a list that the hospital had given me. A rep will come out to see what is required. Now, an agency is licensed, bonded, insured, and has worksman's comp for their employees. They handle the payroll so no worry about payroll deductions. Yes, this approach is expensive. My Dad was paying $20k per month, yes per month in my area, for his care, and he felt it was worth every penny.

Hope you find someone that works out perfectly, and gives your Mom the care she deserves. You can ask for different caregivers to come out, thus you can choose which ones would work out the best.
Helpful Answer (2)
Reply to freqflyer
Report
Lileesa Jul 27, 2019
That is something else to think about. I am one person who loves her mother and I am burned out. My mother is physically demanding but still has an easy going attitude. There is never a problem with how she acts unless she is in pain.

It sounds like your dad had a good (albeit expensive) experience with live in care?
(0)
Report

Ask a Question

Subscribe to
Our Newsletter