I am always impressed by the responses and comradery on this list.
This is my first time posting an issue.
So, my husband is in his early 70's. As he is aging, his is more easily angered, repeats himself often, asks the same question over and over...
It does not take much to set him off and he is quite verbally nasty. He has not gotten physical but there is no guarantee that he wont.
He will likely need to be in a nursing home.
My biggest question is what is the cost?Does regular health insurance provide coverage if there is an accompanying need for physical care? I am still working but I am not made of money.
I didn't know there was such a thing as elder care insurance until a short time ago and am afraid I am either too late or it will be cost prohibitive.
Thoughts? Suggestions? Words of wisdom?
You will understand the costs of care by visiting facilities. Much depends on the type of care you are speaking of. Nursing homes? Assisted Living Facilities? Memory Care? The cost is quite high and varies according to where you are living. San Francisco will likely easily DOUBLE the cost of anywhere else in the country.
You can begin to explore facilities that have varying levels of care. If you have Facebook then peek in on John Knox Village in Lees Summit, MO as a for instance. There you would have assistance as would hubby.
You are looking at very early stages but planning ahead, and quite honestly what you need now is early diagnosis so you can more know where this is all heading. So the discussion now is with hubby's doctor, and the getting of all documents ready. POA and Advance Directives and so on. You should consult with an Elder Law Attorney if hubby needs placement so as to protect your own portion of Marital Assets.
Elder care is expensive as in VERY expensive. I am glad you are thinking about all this but step one, for now, is getting a diagnosis.
If abuse ever becomes physical then you call EMS for transport to hospital at once. There diagnosis WILL happen and you will have access to Social Workers for many of your questions, and for help in placement if that is needed for his and your own safety.
If its found he does need 24/7 care you can place him but you will need to see an Elder Lawyer to have assets split. His split going to his care. When his money starts to run out, you apply for Medicaid. Once he is on Medicaid, you become the Community spouse. You remain in the home, have one car and enough or all your monthly income to live on. You still working, though, may be different than a couple living on SS and pensions.
Make a few appointments. One for a physical and cognition exam with hubbys doctor. Find out a diagnosis. Then find an Elder Care attorney in your area that's versed in Medicaid. Many will give you a free consultation.
Lastly, please call 911 immediately if your husband threatens you or lays a finger on you. Its common with dementia to get agitated and angry. Get him transported to the ER for a psych evaluation. The social worker there can help get him placed.
Get your ducks lined up NOW and be ready to take action when the time comes.
Best of luck to you.
Call your provider. I assume you have or he has Medicare?
There is also Medicaid for low/income.