Mom lives with us. I walked in the room tonight and she said, "Oh, you're still around?" I said ya! (???) She said oh good I was needing a ride and didn't know how to get one. When I asked where she needed to go she said, "home." I just said, "You are home," and then asked her if she wanted me to make her a bowl of cereal. She kind of looked around a bit and then said yes, she wanted the cereal.
I usually try to do matter of fact statement, and then a quick re-direct, but is that the best way to handle those moments?
If it were me / my mom, I would perhaps say "sure, but would you like a bowl of cereal first". This way, you redirect her and don't possibly further confuse her.
Its a tricky situation when you want to provide a 'reality check' when their reality is compromised due to brain changes - and their reality is real to them.
We do what we feel works in the moment. With dementia, you generally always have another chance to 'do better or different' as a loved one won't remember what you've said.
I feel the most important quality in these communications is COMPASSION. If you have that, they get it. If you say 'you're home' and she knows she is loved, she will be okay. Try a hand massage. Touch is amazing when welcomed.
Gena / Touch Matters
The subject of food usually helps in my mom's case. Asking what she'd like for dinner (even when she is eating breakfast), asking what she hasn't had in a long time that she is craving, if she likes sweet or salty foods, does she like ketchup on her french fries, mustard on her hot dog, what her favorite dessert is, etc.
So yes, you're doing great!
She is Sundowning. Please read the strategies for this behavior on this forum's Caregiving Topics.
https://www.agingcare.com/topics/19/sundowners-syndrome
Is your Mom on any meds for depression, anxiety, agitation? If not, it may be time to have this convo with her primary doctor. My Mom has been on the lowest dose of Lexapro and it's been working great for her.