So in the last 6 months I have loss my mother in law. I loved her dearly and still do. But I also feel that if she was here she wouldn't want us all sitting around not moving on. My father in law has been having a hard time with it. (Which I totally understand) My husband is not doing very well with either. (I again totally understand) So when everything happen my FIL moved in with us. My bother in law has 2 kids and a wife. After 3 months of living with us our ac went out so we stayed with him for a month until it was fixed. When it came time for my husband and I to move home my husband was hesitant. I told him that if he wanted to live with his dad that is fine but we needed to pick one place and stop being back and forth. So the consoler has told both my husband and FIL that we need to live separate. Well my husband and I went home. Now though when my FIL calls if he is mad my husband becomes mad. If my FIL calls my husband answers it and carries an hour long convo even if we were in the middle of a convo. If my FIL calls and says he heard a noise (no matter what time) my husband gets up and runs to his house. Before my MIL passed we similar issues with him doing the same thing if his mom called or asked something of him. But yet our own home, I cant get him to complete anything unless I nag for months and then start it on my own. I have asked him several times to pick a night for just him and I, some how something always happens with FIL. I have asked him to give us a weekend to do stuff around our house, again FIL ask and he runs. Im not trying to be insensitive I am just trying to understand when I get to have my husband back. When does our marriage become the priority? We have fought about this, we have yelled about this, we have talked about this, we have done everything I can think of. At the end of it he always tells me that he didn't know I felt that way and he is going to work on it. I need help. I am starting to shut down and become very mad at FIL. And I love my in laws. They have always been a great support for me.