What else can I do to alleviate mom's nervousness and anxiety when I go on vacation for 5 days?
I have told my mom that I am going on vacation for over a month to prepare her that I will not see her one day from my usual schedule of seeing her. When I mentioned it to her the first time she was ok with it. Now that it's coming up this coming week she is getting all nervous and anxious.
I have written a note to the caregivers taking care of her for them to read to her from me. I also plan on calling her every evening as I do now. I have told her to let the caregivers help her change her socks daily and that she needs to keep participating in the scheduled activities. My bro and sis said they will each see her an extra day than they usually do. I wrote the days I will be gone on the note and asked the workers to cross off the days until I come back and show her how many days left until I return. On the day I come back, I circled it and printed it in red stating I'm visiting you tomorrow morning. I know they will read it to her and that she will enjoy the phone calls. Is there anything I am missing that I can do to make it as easy as possible for her? She really depends on me a lot as I'm the only child that really visits and spends time with her. I will give her, her shower on Tues. and visit Wed. then I'm off for five days. I will be back on the sixth day to visit her, as usual.
Any suggestions?????? Blessings
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Jinx, funny you should say about getting her a "treat." I bought her a little refrigerator a couple weeks ago. I have it filled with comfort foods for her. Things she likes that she doesn't get at the facility. My sibs think I'm nuts but I don't care. I don't ask them for money to pay for it so I should be able to make her happy with what she likes. We went out Sat. to get her some special foods.
Nonetheless you need your me time. Offer to bring her something typical from we're you are going, so it reminds her you are in fact returning.
Is there any kind of treat you can offer her to "make up for" your absence? Try to talk less about being gone, and more about coming home. She will probably be fine once you are actually gone and she is still alive. It's just anticipation.
HAVE A GOOD VACATION! It won't help her at all if you spend the time worrying about her, and come home more stressed than when you left. If you start to worry, just say, I'm only allowed to worry between 7 PM and 7:30 - the half hour before you call her.
Bless you for the good daughter that you are.
It sounds as if you've thought of everything. You have a calendar showing the days you'll be gone and also a countdown of when you'll be back. Maybe write a little note on each day, something personal that she won't read until your gone. Like on Day 1 you could write, "I'll miss you!" Day 2 you could insert a little joke for the caregiver to read to her. Day 3 you could write something encouraging like, "This isn't so bad, is it?" and on and on.....Let these little personal notes be a surprise to her and she'll look forward to them each day.
Again, I'm so glad you're taking a vacation!!