Are all skilled nursing facilites for rehab the same?

That has not been my experience at my mom's NH/rehab. They notice when she's ill when I think she's looking pretty good. Maybe that 's because I'm an idiot and don't see the symptoms.

I agree that the above scenario is totally unacceptable. I would document it and have a meeting with the DON and the director of the facility. And ask them why my next call shouldn't be to the Joint Commission. I said those words once, very quietly, in a care meeting. My mother has been getting phenomenal care ever since. It may be a coincidence. thanks to Pam S. for teaching them to me.

Babalou ~ Joint Commission of what??? What should I be saying to these people?

Response to help2day: Joint Commission of Healthcare Organizations (JAHCO- but now they just call themselves the "Joint Commission" will certify that the facility meets their rigorous standards that are more detailed than the state or federal regulations. This is an OPTIONAL certification that costs the facility thousands of dollars to receive. If the facility is accredited by the Joint Commission, they will also investigate a complaint. I was an administrator in a JCAHO accredited facility for six years, but it didn't make any difference in how well we did in the state/federal surveys, nor did it make us a "better" facility regarding resident care. In my opinion, it was a great deal of extra paperwork without any real improved client services.
The threat to call the proper authorities may or may not be effective. You should check what state agency surveys the facility in your state. It will be the agency that issues the facility's license, which is posted in the lobby. (If you can't find it, ask.) This is the agency to call if you experience a problem, and you would be entirely justified to call them NOW. They can determine if this happened too long in the past for them to investigate. What you experienced was entirely wrong. What will happen when you call is they will take all relevant information and ask for your name and contact info so that they can call you back with their findings. They will send a surveyor out to the facility to investigate, within 48 hrs in many states, and issue citations if the complaint is substantiated. This is not what the administrative staff at any facility wants to go through, and if a family member does mention the possibility of calling "the state", I'm sure they would be more attentive and take your concern more seriously. But I hope that this new nursing home is willing to listen to you and will communicate changes in your mother's condition without you having to find them on your own. I have always considered families and staff as a "partnership" and most facilities do a much better job than you would gather from reading the responses above. We will never be as good as home, but many do have a mostly compassionate, if imperfect, staff.
May god bless you.