I never really let " end stage" sink in when the Dr told me last month late stage 6 early 7, he is pleasant most of the time, likes to talk, conversation, same subjects, but it's communication & he still can shower & shave, few prompts & no bathroom problems so far, except he can not find the bathrooms without asking, it's almost like I'm seeing decline on a daily basis, I thought late stage meant bed ridden, incontinent, non verbal, etc, but I can see in his eyes he is slipping. He sleeps 12 hours at night & nap a little during the day. I appreciate your thoughts and suggestions from all of you. I will keep you updated on our progress.
twopupsmom, My husband had Alz and Parkinson's disease. When our home-health nurse suggested Hospice, I was shocked. I always thought that was only when death was expected in a few months. I found out, it is also for chronic illnesses, with no hope of recovery, regardless of time. It was one of the best things, I could have done for both of us. They came once a week to start and then 2 or 3 times a week , as needed. I found out the desire for food was the first sense to leave a person. It still bothered me, because I could not stand to think he might be hungry ! He always loved sweets, so I gave him puddings or cake , ice cream, milk shakes, whatever he wanted, I gave that to him. Eating was one of the few pleasures in life, he had left . Hospice can answer all your questions as they come up. This is a very hard time for you , just hug him and love on him, every chance you have. My heart is with you twopupsmom.
twopupsmom, when my husband was in the end stage of his dementia journey I offered food but did not insist that he eat. Some things he liked included scrambled eggs with nacho sauce out of a jar and salsa. Some soups. Popsicles. Ice cream based slushies. Bananas (sometimes). He ate very little the couple of days before his death, and he ate a good breakfast the morning he died.
I know this is a difficult decision to face, but I wonder if getting hospice involved in evaluating him would be helpful at this point. If they don't feel that he is quite ready for that yet, that would perhaps encourage you to continue to try to get him to eat. If they feel he is in his last six months, you might want to take a less aggressive approach to encouraging his eating. Not that you would ever deny him food -- just that you might see his disinterest in food in a different perspective.
My heart goes out to you, two pupsmom. This is a very difficult part of the journey!
Maggie thanks for the "turn off - big plate of food" I am starting to worry about the same thing MinPat asks, my husband, 83, late stage 6 ALZ just does not want to eat, he is on Exelon 13.3 Patch, 3 level of patches for about 9 months now, his base line weight starting was 172, I have him weigh on our scale every 2 weeks, today 148 with clothes, I checked the weight loss side effect but it states 8% loss, he is way past that. He will eat, but he doesn't recognize any food I cook, makes a face and maybe eat 1/3. Will not drink supplements. So I'll try little plates, thanks.
If he is on diuretics (for heart failure, as an example), that can be a symptom of dehydration. Call his doctor. He may want to do a blood test.
Try always having some ice water at arm's length for him. Don't worry too much about his eating. It's amazing how little the elderly REALLY need. Try giving him very small meals a little more often. A piece of toast/jelly for breakfast; a banana mid-morning; hard-boiled egg and applesauce for lunch; bowl of soup/crackers for dinner. See if you can maybe jump-start his appetite.
But a big plate of food? That can be a turn-off sometimes.
When was the last time your husband saw his primary doctor and had blood test run? Is he on any medicine where the side effect would be sleepiness, such as blood pressure pills?
If everything comes back normal for someone his age, depending on what his life career has been and how stressful it was, he could be just plain tired.
I know this is a difficult decision to face, but I wonder if getting hospice involved in evaluating him would be helpful at this point. If they don't feel that he is quite ready for that yet, that would perhaps encourage you to continue to try to get him to eat. If they feel he is in his last six months, you might want to take a less aggressive approach to encouraging his eating. Not that you would ever deny him food -- just that you might see his disinterest in food in a different perspective.
My heart goes out to you, two pupsmom. This is a very difficult part of the journey!
Try always having some ice water at arm's length for him. Don't worry too much about his eating. It's amazing how little the elderly REALLY need. Try giving him very small meals a little more often. A piece of toast/jelly for breakfast; a banana mid-morning; hard-boiled egg and applesauce for lunch; bowl of soup/crackers for dinner. See if you can maybe jump-start his appetite.
But a big plate of food? That can be a turn-off sometimes.
If everything comes back normal for someone his age, depending on what his life career has been and how stressful it was, he could be just plain tired.