Yes, he has issues, but the hospice companies say how it will free up the ALF’s staff. We pay for care from the ALF in form of ‘care points’. Why would I help them decrease their staff/resident ratio and still pay care points? All the hospice companies say the same things: ‘He paid all of his working life for these benefits, why not use them?’ and ‘We’ll pay for all meds, incontinence products, devices needed, RN visits, ADL visits, etc.’ is this just a way for ALFs to have less residents to care for? Or, is this really a benefit to my father and our family with additional care for him? Thanks in advance for all your efforts and advice.
I will be forever grateful for the care that my mom received from the hospice staff. They were fantastic!
I am caring for my father Don, who is 89 years old, living in assisted living with alzheimer's / dementia, arthritis, depression, hearing loss, incontinence, mobility problems, parkinson's disease, sleep disorder, and vision problems.
About Me
Mom passed a few years ago from dementia. Dad had many falls and hospitalizations/rehabs until finally we moved him to an ALF. When we visit he just sits there, we do all the talking - he won’t play a game, do a puzzle, or engage.
It certainly sounds like dad is ready for hospice and the extra layer of care they provide. When my mother lived in Memory Care Assisted Living and kept going to the ER and getting upset about it, we were both at the end of our rope. When hospice accepted her, I was so relieved I cried. Why? No more trips to the ER for useless poking and prodding sessions which did no good for either one of us, no more taking useless vitamins and supplements that did no good for her....just being left in peace and medicated as needed to relieve her anxiety and agitation. A hospital bed to sleep in. A new wheelchair with a higher back that tipped back and stopped her from falling out of it. A device in the bed that sort of cupped her body, making it much harder for her to get up alone and fall out of bed. Visits from nurses and CNAs to bathe her, chaplains to pray with her, social workers to chat with her and visit. The RN kept in close contact with me and would adjust her meds according to her rollercoaster moods and needs. Hospice doesn't cut down the work the AL staff does,,,,,they ENHANCE it, all in an effort to make your father more comfortable and ease the final days, months or years of his life.
Those who insist hospice is useless or money grubbing thieves or whatever have no idea what angels look like. Both times hospice has been a huge help to my parents, and to me, in making our lives easier. In fact, the hospice chaplain married my son in front of dad's hospital bed in his AL room a day before he died. It was an unforgettable experience for all of us, and there wasn't a dry eye in the room.
To me, if Dad is not showing signs of transitioning, I would not bring anyone strange into his life.
While she was on hospice, she had many more eyes on her than she does now:
Nurse 1x/wk.
Bath Aides 2x/wk
Chaplain 2x/month
Social Worker 1x/month.
It was the chaplain who discovered that Mom had fallen and opened up a long gash on her forehead and down her face. I appreciated that the chaplain paid extra attention, and didn't just peek in and assume that Mom was sleeping.
I would definitely bring them back on-board, if Mom were to qualify again. I had a new company come out and check on her, but she doesn't qualify, yet.
The for-profit hospices now are crowding in for their share of the almighty dollar and will do anything to get it.
For all that they give an aid a few times a week, the GOOD meds, and a Social Worker who calls you once. An RN once a week who takes the blood pressure. And for that they charge medicare a ton of money.
What is left out here is DOES YOU FATHER NOW WANT END OF LIFE CARE?
Do you want it for him?
Mind you I am an old retired RN who LOVES hospice, as least as it one was, not as it is now.
Because we have occasionally seen Hospice deliver medications that some families feel did a bit of a speed-up on the Grim Reaper at the door. That's a good thing, to my mind, at the end of life. But if you aren't saying now that this is the end, and that it's accepted? Then tell them to stop these calls or you will report them to Medicare, and that will be the end of that soliciting.
You fail to mention that in your post. It may be because you don't want to accept that your dad might be nearing his end???
But getting back to hospice, yes your dads Medicare will pay for all needed equipment, supplies and medications from hospice, and they will have a nurse to come out just once a week to start(more as he gets closer to dying if you get a good hospice agency)and aides to come bathe your dad twice a week.
So as you can see, your dads hands on care from hospice will be quite limited, and he will still require a lot of hands on care from the team at his ALF.
You can look at it as having extra eyes on your dad as he takes this final journey.
Just know that not all hospice agencies are created equal, so definitely do your homework before bringing one on board.
Hospice care is about keeping a patient comfortable in their remaining days.
I will always be grateful to the hospice staff that cared for my mother.
Please be selective about the provider that you choose if you decide to attain hospice care. Do lots of research before choosing. They are not created equally.
Best wishes to you and your family.
I am familiar with hospice service/care. My mother was in hospice the last two months of her life - she needed it and we didn’t hesitate to get her that extra care.
The reason I wrote the post/question is because I am stumped why I am receiving these calls. My father is not at end of life (but who knows). The companies sent me several different lists for ‘qualifying’ for hospice and actually he does qualify under a few different ‘lists’ - but my question is whether or not it’s really to his benefit? Each company says that hospice is not just for end of life, and tell stories of people being on hospice for a couple of years and some even ‘graduating’ from hospice (as one person on here has responded already that was the case with her LO).
I had hated hospice when my mother was dying and I thought it totally unnecessary for my dad, but at the end I was really glad I'd signed that paperwork.