He just said that our dog looks like the man at the back door caught me off gaurd and I said , you mean this teddy bear picture he snapped back and said a MAN ! Just glad he's seeing the psych at the va on Thursday. I have to repress so much and getting worn out doing so. Maybe there is someone who can comment on this situation for me in the meantime.

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I agree with Golden. You don't have to either agree or disagree. Let him talk. If he says he sees a man, you can ask him what the man looks like, or if it's anyone he knows. Let him talk and don't contradict him if you don't have to.

I learned this from dealing with my sister who became delirious from medication and fever when she was very ill and in the ICU for an extended time. She had all sorts of hallucinations, mainly revolving around activities of the nursing staff, and she would get very upset if we contradicted her. She was already terrified by her helplessness and severe illness, and making her think she was hallucinating (although she was) just sent her off the deep end.

Of course, if any of the beliefs was such that it would ease her mind to be shown that it was untrue, we did that if we could. She thought at one time that she had been moved to a different room and all her personal belongings had been left behind or stolen, and she was thrilled when I was able to show her the items that she thought were missing (I probably told her that they had been lost but her husband had searched high and low until he found them for her).

Try to orient him as much as possible without arguing with him. Show him familiar objects, open the blinds to show him what the weather's like outside, mention people he knows well, etc. That's what the medical staff told us to do with out sister while she was delusional.

Hope this helps.
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Mary, what I have learned from here is that, generally, it is best to go along or at least just listen to the delusions/hallucinations that dementia patients have. You cannot talk anyone out of them.

Therapeutic fibbing is a technique that many find helpful. You could google it -also videos by Teepa Snow.

My mother with vascular dementia had a few major delusions. I never disagreed with her as it was her reality due to the disease process in her brain. I know she would have become quite upset.Your dad's brain is broken in places. Hopefully he will get a good evaluation and treatment, Anti psychotic meds helped mother. Good luck with the VA. The best is to get a geriatric psych doctor to do a complete evaluation. Let us know what happens.
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