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Spouse insists on giving crackers and candy, leaving at chair side 24/7, believes something is better than nothing. Spouse yells when subject will not eat meals provided, as their child difficult to watch

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I agree w/ above comments. With my 88 year old Mom, as well as her 90 year old sister who I did meals for as well (now deceased), I find it to be very important to make the meals look very attractive and arrange on a small plate....small portions, and easy to eat. Meals-on-wheels, for instance (a wonderful service for many) was so unappealing to my Aunt, that she wouldn't touch a bite. If I was there when that food was delivered, sometimes I would cut items into smaller portions, and arrange nicely on a small plate, (adding some extra things that she liked, as though I had put the meal together, and she would eat it. But the key thing for both Mom and my Aunt is/was not too much at once. It's overwhelming for them, and they just can't even begin to tackle it. I make a portion as you would for a toddler or child. I use colorful plates, and make the food look as inviting as possible, and they seem eager to eat it. This is just something that worked for me, and may work for others. I actually don't have a lot of junk food sitting around, (crackers and candy) but I do a mid-morning snack, and a mid afternoon snack, and then the regular three meals a day at regular times so they get used to the "schedule" which they seem to like. A little junk food certainly isn't going to hurt, but I know my Mom would eat candy non-stop if it was around, and I can't think that'd be a good thing. :))
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To be perfectly honest. I have been in this business for over 25 yrs. And when there body is tired and starts shutting down. That is one of the first things to go. No appetite.
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thats a very difficult thing to watch. As they get older, they can only eat small portion of food. My mother (81) has dementia and she always thought she shops and cook all the time. She grew up thinking she's never hungry. Even though she said she's not hungry, The aide or I would prepare small meals and cut in pieces for her to "nosh". for example: she said she never eat for breakfast. She would eat one waffle cut in 1/4 and would eat while reading newspaper. We leave cut pieces of fruit, piece of brie cheese next to her and she would eat. Tell the spouse not to mention food! ask the spouse to start a relaxing conversation and only time will tell will the picky eater will eat. Good luck!
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I agree! I figure that something is better than nothing. My Mom only wants sweets or chips, my problem is she wants to stash food such as cheesy messy and sticky stuff in her room. Rule is never the entire bag in the bedroom, unfortunately she would rather do with out than have it in a bowl today!
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My feeling is at 92 if you don't want to eat then don't eat. I know everyone tries to force it, and I have strongly encouraged my 90 year old mom to eat at times in the past, but now I don't worry about it. Sometimes she doesn't eat, and at other times she eats like a pig. She always has room for her candy, and that's o.k. too. :-)
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