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Didn't know she had 3 policies and signed irrevocable trusts for them after applying for Medicaid and now Medicaid says funeral prepay must match prepay insurance. Prepay was 3606.00 and cash value at time of trust was 5050.00. Medicaid gave permission to increase funeral arrangements to match value but now funeral home says no due to trusts. If the funeral home does not add to the prearranged plan then it is a gift to the funeral home for the extra amount per Medicaid. Can they deny changing the plans without changing the amount with it being an irrevocable trust? Is this not unethical? And they made her pay for her headstone and inurnment separate from the insurance?

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Kind of complicated--talk to a lawyer about this. You need to know how much money you will have available when the time comes. Funerals are unbelievably expensive!

And yes, it's not unusual to have the headstone chosen and paid for after death, and the internment costs have gone way up over the years. Some policies cover it ALL, some only cover a portion.
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