My parents live on their own. My father is mentally completely fine but unfortunately has declining MS (having trouble walking), had bladder cancer with cystectomy and now has been diagnosed with Stage 4 urothelial cancer. There may be treatment options that will begin soon to extend his time; however, the main issue right now is that my mother is verbally abusive to my father and anyone around to the point where even though we walk on eggshells and coddle her, she screams at him and us. I end up shaking when I am there and crying for what he is going through. At a time when he needs emotional support and compassion she is just the opposite. The physical therapist when I was there recommended he get a motorized wheel chair to supplement his walker, so he could at least get out of bed everyday when going through chemo. My mom refuses to let him get a chair. When I was there this week, she even commented "why can't you walk" when he was struggling to get back in the house after an appt. She also sort of pushed himout of her way. She is 100% abusive and needs treatment or meds but my dad says he doesn't know what to do and neither do the rest of us. I actually thought about contacting social services but I don't know where to start. Of course I do love my mom but this is unacceptable and she has always been angry, controlling and nasty. Help please!! This is gut wrenching for me to watch happen. I have offered for my dad to move in with either my sis or I but he wants to stay in his house which I understand and we are in the NE and they live in the south. He also feels bad for my mom and I'm sure loves her but he has always been abused as have the kids. He is the opposite of her and always has been. There is nothing but sweetness in him and that has always been the case. He knows she is sick (mentally). We have urged her for years to get help to no avail. Again, please help me if you have any good advice.