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My friend is 30. She has aspergers and lives with her boyfriend who's also autistic. She had always depended on her parents, they helped get her groceries,medication and take her to dr visits. She is mostly homebound only leaving for dr apt. She can take care of herself except for anything outside of the home. Her parents both died unexpectedly 3 years ago. Her siblings are terrible. They refused to help get groceries,medication or pay bills, leading to eviction, loosing government voucher for housing and ended up homeless for over a year. The other siblings recieved their inheritance right away, she waited a year. Her parents always said she'd be able to live in the home after they were gone, that her sister ( who is also a dr) would take care medical, and housing, her trustee is another sibling, and the attorney is siblings best friend. They have spent a rediculas amount of money on stuff they don't inspect, including mobile homes, they put her in a place out of her budget, and pay for things they aren't supposed too. They get angry, don't pay bills and her cable,phone ect get shut off. They make the rules however they see fit. She is extremely iscolted. Won't talk to anyone outside the situation, and they don't have contact with her except maby once a month. They are really cruel. The things I've heard, is extreme. My question is, is it abuse? She doesn't need a guardian, although they'd love to do it, but only needs assistance with shopping and getting things done outside the home. To my knowledge it's any assistance needed for daily living. This family is wealthy, very influential and will be furious with her is she says she's unhappy. So she isn't wanting to say anything. She's waiting to die, that's how she explains it. She was very close to her mom and dad and they really did a good job with her care. She has no idea amount in trust, what it says. I'm certain she's signed things because she was asked to but doesn't understand what they mean. What's the law with this? Her brother is a co trustee. I have no idea how that happens, he sexually abused her in her childhood and she doesn't feel ok asking this guy for anything. Any advice?

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She needs an attorney.
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I agree, but how could she find one with only receiving ssdi ssi benefits, not only that, one that isn't somehow friends or associates of the family?
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Frankly, this sounds like something more than Autism.

Do you have personal knowledge of this situation, other than your friend's account of things?

When friend was homeless, were social service agencies involved?

Yes, she needs an attorney who can help her understand the trust ( I assume it's a special needs trust) but the real question is, if she won't venture out into the world and won't talk to outsiders, how will a lawyer help?
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Good point, Barb. If a Special Needs Trust the home may be included. She definitely needs an attorney! Contact the Bar Association in your state, or see if there is Legal Aid services available.
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It sounds like your friend needs some guidance navigating through the trust process. It doesn't really sound like she's being abused. She's not being exploited. She's not being used for money by someone. She's not being manipulated or taken advantage of or physically harmed in any way. I agree that she needs someone to step in and walk her through the legalities. But how does she go about finding an attorney?

Are her boyfriend's parents supportive? Could they help her?

When her SSDI comes up for review, who helps her prepare her statements?
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Her mother worked for disability rights. I've known her for many years, I'm 17 years older, we met through her grandmother. I have stayed many nights with her, especially since her mother died. I have helped her when I am not working. When she was homeless, she recieved her ssdi and ssi. Medicaid and snap. Social services have never been called. She was misdiagnosed as a child with GAD. She is diagnosed now as autism, and anxiety disorder. She's been disabled since 1999, for GAD. 5 years ago they diagnosed as autism after a new evaluation. Her mother took care of everything on disability reviews I'm sure. Her siblings have never really been a part of her life except when home with her parents.
Boyfriends parents are not living here. I have found another agency to call. I'll be doing that to,maro
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She's entitled to independent advocacy, possibly a guardian ad litem, certainly a review of her living situation overall. Call APS and get advice from them.

Um. There is a subtle but important difference between accepting what a person tells you, and believing it in its entirety. But I'm sure that you know that better than I do - this young lady is fortunate to have you on her side.
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Asbergers is high fuctioning on the autism scale. She should be able to do for herself but then u throw in anxiety. Call ur local Autistic assoc. Tell them the story and see if someone can advocate for her or at least point u in the right direction. Her siblings are abusing their rights. Did the parents wills say she could stay in the house. If so the executor did not do their job. Also, when u talk to the Autistic center ask about transportation for her.
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