Almost 6 months in hospice my mom is declining daily. Breathing pattern changes. Bowel changes. Restlessness. Agitation. Pain. And she is literally all over the place. Still mobile. Talks out of her head a lot. And today has been like the twilight zone. She has been up doing laundry. Cleaning her bathroom. Literally will not sit still. Nurse listened to lungs today said can hear conjestion. Going to give antibiotics just to please momma. She says it’s a bad cold but it’s not. She’s in last stage of Stage 4 metastatic cancer.
Am I going crazy or is this energy level normal???

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It's very hard to witness all the changes a parent goes through during their end of life experience with hospice. I found myself not breathing myself when my father's breathing slowed was terrible. I was using my watch to time his breaths, and holding my own during his lapses! I would put him under a microscope and watch his every movement, and I was driving myself crazy in the process. I had to step back and force myself to leave his apartment at the ALF and go home for a while to unwind.

While dad didn't enjoy any surges of energy during his hospice experience, I have read about many who have. It must be very surreal to watch your mom up and about, like she once was, doing laundry and cleaning! Like a blast from the past, huh? Sending you a big hug and a prayer that God helps the two of you through this difficult time.
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You need to just relax and let nature take it's course with your mom. When God is ready to take her home He will, and until then just try and enjoy whatever time you have left with her.
Getting upset over these different stages she seems to be going through doesn't help anyone, and only increases your stress level.
Everyone's death journey is different, and just because she's been under hospice care now for 6 months doesn't mean that she will die any day now.
My husband was under hospice care in our home for 22 months and he had "congestion" in his lungs for about the last 6 months of his life, so that doesn't really mean much of anything.
And while this could mean that she in fact is "rallying," it also may not mean that. So please, spend as much time as you can with her, say everything you need to(leave nothing left unsaid)and just enjoy each other, as there will come a day soon enough that you will wish that she was still here for you to care for.
I pray for God's peace to cover you in the days ahead.
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I don't want to alarm you but sometimes people have a brief, dramatic surge like this before an equally dramatic decline🤗
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Herdaughter54 Sep 2021
yes I’ve heard of this so called surge. It’s just so weird and scarey. I’m so very afraid after this she won’t bounce back. I read the article on the link you posted. Thank you for the info
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