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You don't say how old you are. Taking care of an 89 yr old with multiple health problems will not be easy. Can you lift. Are you willing to help with toileting. Dress, keep a pill planner. Bathe. At 89 he may get better care in a VA facility where u can visit. I agree, go to the VA first.
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The Disabled American Veterans (DAV) is a good place to start as well as the various service organizations. DAV may be able to go with you and many of the service organizations have certified counselors.
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First thing you can do is help him meet with a VA service officer to get qualified for medical care. The service officer can determine whether he qualifies for additional support, such as the Aid & Attendance, Homebound or other VA support.

It's my understanding that if he does qualify for assistance in his home, the VA will make payments for that service. I think you might have to train with and work through a private duty company though, so that you're hired as an actual employee rather than a friend.

Start by calling the VA, or contact one of the service organizations that might have an office in the VA building. Another option is to see a service officer at one of the county or local facilities. In my area, there are 2 county offices with staff familiar with VA quals.
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