Follow
Share

He has been bossing me around my whole life, I'm exhausted.

Maybe we can hook him up with my mother, the boss Queen, she is a young chick, she is only 94! They can try to boss each other around. Maybe they will exhaust each other out and leave us alone!
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to DollyMe
Report
Ahmijoy Jul 17, 2019
Hee Hee. OP has left the building. This was one of those “once and gone” posts that leave us wondering.
(1)
Report
FrustratedWI, I see from your profile that your Dad is living in Independent Living, or did you mean he was still living in his house? If he is still under his own roof, are you also under the same roof?

Usually what happens is the adult/child dynamic, where once again Dad is the adult, and once again you are the child, even if you are a senior yourself. I had that issue with my parents. They were still viewing me as a 30 year old who had unlimited energy and who could do anything. NOT!! I was in my mid 60's.

I even tried showing my parents my Medicare card, and my AARP membership card. It didn't phase them.

Honestly, I couldn't find anything short of breaking my arm to give me some quiet time. When my parents saw the sling, they didn't ask for me to do anything. When the doctor told me it was time to stop using the sling, I explain my situation regarding my parents, and he was ok with me wearing the sling only when I visited them :P
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to freqflyer
Report

Independent living puts all the responsibility on the care giver, I guess that's you.
Assisted living allows you to NOT be the primary care giver. If you can find the right facility, the aides there provide the care, giving you the time to care for yourself. I don't know what your financial situation is, but it may still be worth your time and to save your sanity.
Helpful Answer (0)
Reply to lamardavid
Report

Its going to be hard to break the pattern. Its going to be hard to set boundries now. I am going too assume that u are at least 65, a Senior too. My Mom once said about my Dad, who she waited on hand and foot "they don't tell you when they are old and you are too, you don't feel like putting up with their "s _ _ t" My parents were in their late 70s.

I am assuming that ur in ur 60s maybe 70s. TG he is not living with you. Its time to show the "Senior Card". Tell him "Dad do you realize I am 70 yrs old, like u I am a Senior. And as a Senior your demands are exhausting. I can't keep up with them anymore. We need to compromise here. I am just not able to give u 24 hrs a day 7 days a week. I need time to myself." Or something to that effect.

Is he calling you all the time? Tell him it has to stop. Once a day is enough. And, unless an emergency, things get done in ur time. And don't feel u have to visit all the time.
Helpful Answer (0)
Reply to JoAnn29
Report

I'm going through it with a family member. He has been diagnosed with dementia. My family member that I provide care for is 88, and I NEVER receive a kind word. I have decided it is time for someone else to provide his care. I am looking at assisted living, and memory care facilities. It may be time for you to look at available options. Good Luck
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to lamardavid
Report
JoAnn29 Jul 15, 2019
He is in independent living.
(0)
Report
So, what do you think the solution should be for everyone’s benefit?
Helpful Answer (0)
Reply to Ahmijoy
Report

Ask a Question

Subscribe to
Our Newsletter