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My family really needs help so I'll give a little backround on the situation:
My grandmother has always been a little off, depression and bipolar disorder mainly, and since my grandpa died over 10 years ago has not been able to take care of herself. My mom being the oldest and the only mentally fit child on the eastern shore (only aunt not dealing with major mental problems is in Maui) takes care of her as much as she can; she has lived with us twice for a total of 4 years and both times getting her to leave was hell. The second time she lived with us was when her house was condemned and my parents put their time and money into fixing it up for her because she refuses to move into a retirement home. She has lived in it for about 9 mos. and it is already falling apart again. Her neighbor constantly harrasses and steals from her, which she allows because "jesus wants us to forgive". She has incontinence and urinates into cups in the middle of the night which she leaves under her bed. We have tried so many times to persuade her to move out and into assisted living because we feel she cannot manage a home and puts herself in danger. But she will not budge. She gets nasty and manipulative. My mom has no help from her siblings on this, is there anything she can do? We are tired of worrying about her safety

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We went through something similar with my mother in law with Ahlzheimers. People were taking advantage of her and she couldn't live totally independently anymore. We ended up moving her into the house right next door to us so we can monitor her closely and make sure she eats, takes her meds etc. She was NOT HAPPY for about 3 months but now has adjusted nicely. It's not ever easy but sometimes you just have to use tough love and do what is right for them...not what they want. You may have to get her declared incompetent and take guardianship or something like that so you can make the decisions that need to be made. Would she listen to her DR if he gave her orders to not live alone? You have my sympathy. Hang in there. It's never easy but often necessary to make the hard decisions for them when they can't.
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