Hi! I’m new here looking for advice.
My mom has been confused, not understanding things for a few years. Basic remote control (one button), not remembering things, writing a check is difficult, no basic problem solving abilities. Now it’s been three nights over a few months (about x1 month) and she having hallucinations.
1st time in Dec - she called us at 1am saying she wanted to call 911 since there was barking dogs keeping her up and there was a party going on across the street. Balloons all over across the street. I went outside. No balloons. Very quiet. I thought maybe the Christmas lights resembled balloons? No barking.
The 2nd time was in Feb, similar type story and she got her keys and went out to the driveway, snapped out of it, realized it wasn’t real and then came back inside.
The 3rd time was yesterday, similar hallucination middle of night, but she walked towards the next door neighbors house, snapped out of it, came back home.
We live with her, but we are starting to think she should be living at a care facility? I don’t know what to do. I have much comfort knowing she is here and we can help, but I’m also scared what if she hallucinates/leaves in the middle of the night and gets lost, or gets in a car and drives somewhere? What do we do?
She says we take things, or the dog peed when she didn’t and someone stole her grocery bag at the store. They didn’t. A broom was taken from her room and it was in the garage. Very paranoid and accusing.
Thing is, she seems fairly normal during the day. Confused a lot, but can carry a conversation ok.
Should she stay or should we seek help? Not sure what to do, or who to turn to.
I should mention the Dr has not diagnosed her. Last year, he said she’d just getting older and mildly confused. It was so frustrating. She has something going on. We don’t know what it is though.
Thank you for reading and for any advice.
My gut says dementia, even though we don’t have an official diagnosis. She has always been a very paranoid and secretive person. I didn’t know she had a first marriage until I was 22! So I feel like she’s not telling me things that she’s experiencing b/c she doesn’t want to lose her car or go to a facility. She’s told me she doesn’t want to go to a facility, so I feel like how does that work? I’d hate for something to happen to her if she left and got lost?How does this work?
Her once per year appt with Medicare is not until June. Should we wait til then? It seems so far away.
First comes the diagnosis. THEN decisions are more easily made because you will have some idea of the trajectory of the future.
These hallucinations sound VERY much like Lewy's Dementia. My brother suffered from hallucinations from Lewy's that were very real and very detailed. He described them as "dreaming while awake" and could talk of whole garden parties around the pool in his yard (he had no pool) and describe even how everyone was dressed. He "found" an immigrant woman, all in monk-like brown robes huddling in the corner of his room, trying to protect her baby, but when he touched her, poof, she was gone.
Please now work toward diagnosis.