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by her as well as my two sons, one 18, one 28. My 18 year old is autistic and is I feel as thoughthey only
care about how, when I'm deadly sick with hep c, currently being treated with Harvoni (extreme fatigue, leaving me wiped) as well as severe Bronchitis and down with C-Diff (gross), 3rd stage liver disease how that will affect them. Not any concern for my health. My mom has gotten to be very hateful.
she refuses to help me through the regspite I qualified for. I tried sooo hard to convince her to go to this adult day care. No way! She doesn't unde4rstand why I'm desperate to learn to put myself into this equation. Id better learn or I'm convinced, no dout, ill either have lost my sanity, my self-worth, my mental and emotional health. I have not been away from my mother for the last 9 years. I have spent everyday, with her, 24/7 (being mean and treating me as though I have it made. I so want to run away, be in my car , just keep going and never look back, Ive never been more afraid in my life as I am right now. My brothers, who did not want to disrupt there perfect lives couldn't be bothered but told me I will be out in the street when Mom goes. I need some mental health days and ways for me to put things into perspective, maybe get to know myself again. I'm more lost than Ive ever been before. I have been isolating myself and am incredibly lonely. One reason is out of ammbarrasement. I used to be a Proffessional Model and always took pride in my appearance. My teeth came out, Ive got wrinkles, and one breast I had augmented years ago went THHH(flat), II have 2 diseases, hep C and c-diff and always. The extreme stress I feel , now stems from not one member of my family asking if I feel alright, if there is anything they to do do help knowing we were having a hard time. Never happen. Nick is my Moms golden boy and me and my other son can fudge ourselves according to her. I so love my family but they are slowly killing me HELP!!!!!

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I am so sorry for you. Do get better with Harvoni, I am about to start treatment too. Get away from that family! You need to get a job, any job, to get away from being dependent on a family that disrespects you so much. Sometimes we have to give up on those that abuse us. I did that 3 times and I am so glad. When the last dies, I am not sure I will go to the funeral and am sure he wouldn't come to mine. It is sad, but what is worse is being a victim.
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sndry, you are in quite a spot. I hope the Harvoni works in clearing the virus. I had a friend who went through treatment a few months ago. He is now Hep C free and so happy. The treatment can be rough, but so worth it. Maybe you can tackle your present state one problem at a time. The first is to finish your treatment. I wouldn't do anything extreme until it is over. All good hopes coming from here that this is the first step in getting back totally on your feet.

Teeth can be fixed and lines get more pleasant when stress if less. As women, so much of our younger lives are invested in our appearance. I remember how it used to hurt when someone said, "I bet you were a looker in your time," and I was only in my 30s! We tie so much of ourselves into what someone else approves of. We have to rebuild another self that is built on the true us, and not the younger "pretty" us. That person fades, and we are left with the real person we are. It sounds like that woman is pretty unique and I hope that you find her.

Anyway... treatment first, getting away from mean-Mama second. And rebuilding your real self the whole time. Is your autistic child low or high functioning? You have really been given some hurdles to jump.
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It's fine to love your family, but sometimes we need to see other people for what they are and then decide how much distance is needed for self-protection.
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When you make the choice to put yourself into such a situation, please note you also have the choice to take yourself out of that situation to live your own life.
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