Dad is 84 and in poor health. He's currently living with my brother and sis-in-law (SIL) and has been there nearly 6 months now. Needless to say, he's changed their lifestyle. He's often unsteady on his feet, has "accidents" often, and needs to be watched/looked after whenever he's awake. My SIL, fortunately, doesn't work outside the home and is available to keep an eye on him all the time and she's doing a wonderful job. However, his care is taking it's toll... my brother says my SIL falls into bed each night totally drained of energy. Neither he nor her are getting a full night's sleep, as he's often up during the night to "fix" himself something to eat and one of them needs to get up and watch to make sure he's safe. Half the time, at these times, he's confused and doesn't even know where he is or what's he's doing. He cooks food in the microwave for 5.00 minutes rather then 50 seconds, turns on the water and leaves it running, etc.. I think you all know the situation I'm describing.
I've been talking to him over the last few weeks about his need to compensate my brother and SIL beyond just paying his living expenses (share of the groceries and utilities). I've proposed he pay 1,500.00 to them, above and beyond those costs.
He's got the money to do it and he's agreed with me that they are going far above and beyond as far as their care of him is concerned...but it's been three weeks and he's not paid a thing yet. My last conversation with him ended with his saying that he wants me to "put it in writing" what I want him to pay and why he should pay it.
So I need some help...I've researched the cost of in-home care in his state, but I need to write more then just that...it's the why he should pay them question that I'm not sure how to put in writing. I don't want dad thinking that my bro and sil are caring for him only for the money... I'm the one who brought up the whole thing in the first place. Both my older brother and I (who live in a different state from caregiving brother and SIL) are on board with this... I'm POA for dad though, and that's why I'm the one ram rodding this.....he does tend to listen to me on matters of finance, although he is his own Trustee with me as co trustee.
Anyone have any suggestions as to what I can say that would convince Dad that paying them is the right thing to do?
Thanks for any helps in advance and happy caregiving everyeone!