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Well thought things had changed but doesn't look like they have. Things have been going well with my honey. (and I use the term loosely at this point). He has been doing well as far as the way he has been treating me. Should have realized when he told me about a week ago that he was trying his best to be the way that I want him to be that there were thunder clouds ahead.


His weight skyrocketed to 198.6 from 186.6 in less than two weeks which means he is retaining fluid again. He has now lost two pounds in a approx 4 days. What does he do? He starts in about McD's french fries. When I refused to go get any (he can't drive) he started getting nasty. Telling me he doesn't get anything he wants and doesn't have anything. Told him I refuse to argue with him and was going to my study. At which point he very nastily stated I can go where I want it is my house he just lives here. Then he started threatening to leave. I refused to rise to the bait. I reminded him that he has to watch his sodium intake and McD's fries have quite a bit of sodium. He went balistic. He started in on my shaking and anything else he could think of. Then called me lazy as I have not been killing myself working on both of my sites. He said he was going to leave. Advised him maybe I had better start looking for a job. He said "whatever". Reminded him that he was the one that told me I could not work outside the home. When he said I was just like my mother, twisting things around to suit me. I stopped it all. ( I wanted to tell him he was acting just like his mother did... sweet as pie and then all of a sudden being vicious. I didn't though). I did tell him that as to him having to try to be the way I want him, he didn't have to for thirty years..what happened? Why did this all start last Feb? He couldn't or wouldn't answer me. I did remind him that I will not tollerate verbal abuse. He said why can't I just can't forget that. At which point I asked him "did he think that I could forget something that has only happened a couple of months ago. It takes time to forget something like that." I did tell him that if he is trying to alienate me he is doing a good job. When he brought my Mother into it, I refused to talk to him after that. Right now I feel like a maid, cook, housekeeper and nurse...not even a roommate.


He is now sleeping. His weight gain and difficulty is his own fault. He has not been compliant with his walking and anything other than his upper body exercise (then wonders why he fell night before last). His only walking is again from the couch (when he sits on it) to the dining room chair, bathroom and then to the bed (where he spends most of his time again). He also wants fast food daily which he knows is high in sodium. Ugh. I have been told by him that his sodium intake, exercise habits etc are not my concern and he does not care what I think about it or say about it. (this about 3 weeks ago). He is on a walker and starting to have mobility issues, on a 24/7 IV and is having difficulty. Again his own fault. I am about ready to let his doctors know what is going on though he doesn't want me telling his doctors anything. His brother and SIL are coming up to take us out for my birthday dinner. Now he is refusing to go. Oh well...will just go without him. This is my 67th BD and a milestone. All of my family...Mom, Dad, Grandparents etc except one aunt passed away at 67. Though I am adopted my medical has followed my Mom's medical to the point it is eerie. So I am going to enjoy my BD, though I plan on living for many years.


Thanks everyone for putting up with my rambling and allowing me to vent again. I have not been on much lately as I have been trying to get my tremors (full body) under control. (was so bad for awhile I had trouble typing and could not draw or paint). Y'all have a great day!

Thanks FrazzledMama and SnoopyLove...

Snoopy....Thanks for the BD wishes (smile). I have already let him know that I am rethinking our relationship/arrangement. So we shall see. And yep...he went from being 66 to 5.

FrazzledMama… Thanks and thanks for the BD wishes (smile). Not going to let him get me down. Think I have figured out the reason for the shaking....stress. But am still going to see the neuro.

Y'all have a great night!
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Happy birthday, Dusti! I hope you enjoy many more.

As for your honey, he is extremely lucky to have you, but doesn't seem able to realize this. He should know there isn't a line of folks lining up to be his nurse/maid/errand-runner, etc. I think you should feel free to revisit the whole arrangement you have with him if it is no longer working out for both of you.
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So sorry you are going through this, Dusti. I think you did the right thing by telling him you refuse to argue with him and walking away. It sounds like he's throwing a tantrum because he's mad and upset about his dietary restrictions and his health, but he shouldn't take it out on you.

I hope you have a very happy birthday celebration in spite of all of this, and that you get to feeling better too and that your neurologist can figure out what's going on. I'm glad you are going to go and celebrate, you deserve it!!
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