
Many of us, myself included, come from a dysfunctional family which adds a lot of weight to the challenges of caregiving. I have read stores on various threads on other topics and decided it would be good to have a thread just for this topic for people to share, vent and discuss.
The idea for this thread originated on the thread named "The Caregiver....How are YOU doing today?"
Mica, ohhh, that package would have pissed me off too! I hope you gotbyour aggressions out, but also hope it wasn't something Fabulous, that you could have passed along to someone else! You might save it, for prosecution later on, it could be valuable to your case!
Golden, hope you are feeling better!
Alli, that HUD housing sounds perfect for your Dad! I hope brothe comes to realize thisvtoo, before the apartment doesn't endvup going to someone else! How does he like the Jitterbug phone? I hear they are great for chubby fingers and low vision!
I also got on my FIL about his lack of appreciation and thanks, for all his Son does for him. Of course he denied it, until I told him that I hear his Son complain Every Day about it! Now today and ever since, he is going overboard on his Thank-you's, so hubby now doesn't feel like he's being genuine. I can't win for losing here!
Couldn't figure out where that awful smell was coming from, After hubby spent 2 hours cleaning up after yesterday's incident. It seems that Charlie-girl got into the poo, so easily accessible, after FIL failedvto shut the bathroom door with his poopy and soiled clothing in a pile on the floor, and she must have rolled around in it, as Dogs just Love to do! Barf, another bath for Charlie-girl, and she just has one a few days ago, that aught to teach her! Spoke to the Old Man about it too! No real reaction though. Next time he falls, we'll just leave him laying in his own filth for a while longer! That aught to teach him! Just kidding!
My druggie cousin's stepdaughter took my grandmother's good jewelry years ago... at least that's the story I heard. It's terrible. I would pay double whatever was paid by a pawn shop just to get those items back. :-(
How come BRO isn't helping to protect his mother from preying family?? How is it that you (far away) are to blame but he's next door but has no responsibility... just GRR and UGH.
Upset, I can't believe your own brother so much as admitted that he was in on the jewelry heist thing! It is such a personal and emotional and heartsick feeling when anyone Steals your Jewelry, let alone Family, but what an Awful, Vindictive and Horrific thing to do to their own Granny! And that your brother knew, and is holding it over your head, so Spiteful! I hope you have called the police! And after everything you have done for this whole family? Wow! What in the World? I hope your Aunt and Uncle reccomend that she press charges, other than that, there's not a lot you can do but shake your head! The games Dysfunctional families play, huh? Sorry Sweetie!
Upset, I am sorry you keep getting sucked back in. If his answer was that pat and quick it was probably bro's idea. This may sound harsh, but can you just not respond? Each involvement shows them you are still entwined. After all of it is still she said, he said, they did. I just had to step away because I realized they were all liars in my own family. Just a thought. Hearsay report of theft by you from another state of elder stuff? Not a winning judge Judy moment since your mom would possibly be in on it.....unknowing of course.......yeah.
I really feel for you, for what you and your husband are having to go through with his dad! I understand he's a narc and all of that. It does sound as if the old man has had quite a bit of freedom, being inside your home, and not allowing someone to clean up his room. Isn't he living in your home?
I hope you can have a talk with your husband, sounds like some denial has been going on.
I hope he is feeling better after this, so you don't have to stress so much.
Hugs,
Much Love & Light! Margeaux
BES - good advice - speaking from experience
upset - Oh dear! They really are dreadful ad that bad bro admits to it and then blames you I hope the law can do something. I kinda agree with guest - really restrict contact with bad bro. I ended up not answering my sis's phone calls when they became abusive. I don't need it.
glad - Woo Hoo - well done - a position much nearer your kids and out from under your crazy super and back in your home state. Prayers for a good rental. You are getting into packing already!!! Way to go. Makes me realize that after all the dealing with other's stuff here, I will eventually be packing up my own things . Don't want to think about that right now!!!
guest - you have a point - it may be a lot of smoke with everyone involved just to "get" upset back.
sharyn - why not? Might as well get a head start.
margeaux - what you say makes sense. Of course a narc does not necessarily go along with what makes sense.
east - I am glad your mum was OK when you bro was away. I doesn't sound like she will move easily, but the time may come when she has to. Your mum will fill all the space in your head of you let her. BTDT. I finally wanted to think about other things and life was more pleasant.
ali - hope things are working out as you plan.
jessie, heart, cm, susan, chris - thinking of you all
If I missed anyone,totally unintentional. My head is still a bit fuzzy.
Had a couple of mild bugs, not bad but they trigger the CFS/FM. It is not that bad either, but I have needed a lot of sleep and don't have any zip. This too will pass. I have made mental lists of what I want to do, when I have the energy.
I did get down to the service center and pick up my car and do a little shopping. I want to try few sharp stops in an empty parking parking lot to see how the car behaves. It felt good on the way home. I have been back and forth re the car so often, the service center shuttle driver and I are exchanging recipes and kitchen tips. ;p
Got lucky shopping and found a warm dressing gown at a good price and some bootee type slippers that keep your ankles warm. Last night I actually was too hot wearing the robe and slippers. That's a first and very welcome.
All in all, life could be worse. I have plans for the new year if my energy cooperates. My youngest grandson challenged me to complete Sonic 6. I used to be very good at Sonic (about 20+ years ago) and my youngest boasted about me to his friends at school. G'son has an Xbox1 and I do not intend to buy one, but, apparently, can get a hand held control to use on the computer to practice. Wish me luck.
When I have more energy and weather permitting I will head south probably with dd. To replace an item I lost in the flood, I bought a vintage folding rocker which I loved to sit in close to the fireplace. Middle son will pick it up middle of Jan. The guy selling it is downsizing his grandpa's (aged 96) stuff We chatted a bit about it. We used to live a few streets from where he is. Small world.
I boiled up a ham and that is my contribution to tonight's revelry. The house smells good!
Have a Happy New Year everyone! Hope 2017 is better than 2016.
Happy New Year Everyiner
I hadn't seen her in quite some time, only in phone contact very minimally.
She's going through a divorce at the moment. It was rather weird, because she already had a new boyfriend in tow at the funeral. Thought that was strange.
WOW!! I couldn't believe it! After the service there was a reception at a restaurant.
It didn't even really seem like a funeral, more like a party. There was quite a bit of drinking going on, including my friend.
She is the kind of person who loves to bring up things from our past, knew her in high school and college. She basically doesn't know when to stop some of the information she shares, even started to talk about her ex husband, during that era in front of this boyfriend. IDK, I often wonder about people who are so willing to talk about their exe's in front of a new partner. I feel that is very, very rude.
Well the thing that really bugged me, as she continued having her beers was that she even started trying to ask me about a relationship from my last life, so long ago, which didn't turn out good. Her name is Debbie.......and I ended up nicknaming her Debbie the dredger. Honestly, that's what it felt like, as I tried my best to skirt her nosey questions and statements.
I'm so glad that I made the decision to not take my husband with me to this.
He doesn't know her, nor the deceased.
Much Love & Light! Margeaux
What would we do without each other here?
All the very Best....
Glad - wishing you a great new beginning with this move
Margeaux - How awkward you must have felt. People are so baffling sometimes.
Golden - Thank you and best of luck with Sonic!! It's kind of adorable that you can rock the video games!