My dad (79) has been in hospice (at home ) since September. My mom (79) cares for him mostly along with a lot of help from hospice and me and my brother and sometimes a sister (I do their finances, some light cleaning and am "on call" for whatever else they might need.)
I have an 18 year old son with Aspergers and I sometimes wonder which has been more difficult. That or caring for my parents?
It's been a rocky roller coaster ride and all the issues with my parents started coming to a head just when I thought I would get a life after staying home with my son and homeschooling him for 9 years...so I have some issues with bitterness and resentment!
A recent incident with my younger brother cause those feelings to resurface . Long story short. Mom and Dad have a big house that they aren't leaving until Dad goes. My brother says "my wife and I are going to buy the house" Yea! We don't have the stress and worry of selling it. He changed his mind. Didn't tell anyone and my husband saw my brother's house for sale online. We asked him what was going on....he evaded and ignored. Anyway...it's all out in the open..no thanks to my secretive brother. We (me?) now have the added stress/worry of selling the house in the future. I have always had a great relationship with my (younger) brother and he has been a huge help to my parents. That must be why his actions disappoint and anger me so much.
He made a promise to my parents and changed his mind. OK. People change their minds but he was secretive and didn't let anyone know and it was huge decision.
I have to forgive him (and his wife) there is no other choice...but I can understand how family feuds begin and fester. My feelings for my brother changed overnight and I really hate it. I do love my brother. I just really, really hate how he acted. It feels good to just write this all down and it helps in my attempt to stay bitterness free and sane during all of this.