Wish she would die or I could. But neighter is going to happen. So hard to deal with her. I'm sick of it. Ther is noone else to help. Except minor things ocationally. No relatives except brother that makes things worse. She doesnt have friends. Only knows one neighbor. Who doesnt want to help. I have talked to her. Barbara

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Hadnuff - what kinds of demands is she making? Decide what you are willing to do and what you are not willing to do. I decided a while back NOT to do things for which there are services: housecleaning (call Merry Maids), grocery/pharmacy (pay for delivery), doctor appointments (use of Senior $2 trip travel service). What I do is help with forms and online forms and research options.

NOTE - my mom did not like this one little bit and tried a few things like 1) not cleaning or doing laundry (her choice) or going to her doctor appointments (her choice) in order to force my hand. But she is competent so if she chose to live in filth and not go to the doctor - her choice. I told her that while I loved her, I could not longer manage 2 households - so I am willing to do X, Y, and Z. I had relatives calling and yelling at me about my mom - etc. FINALLY, with my help -she set up services.

You don't have to do it all even though she might insist. Help her find options

I can relate. I am the only person my mom has... she has ostracized herself from all of her former friends and family and won't be happy until she drives me to suicide, I feel. I have been setting up her meds and paying all of her bills, but she doesn't appreciate it and won't let me bring anyone else in to help, because I'm at my wits end. Yesterday I just dropped off her bag of pills (which I had been putting in a pill sorter for her) and told her she could just figure them out, along with all of her bills, on her own, since she doesn't need any help. I am starting to see signs of anxiety in myself and don't want to completely go off the deep end. She refuses to go to a nursing home or let me have someone come in to her home. It's four days before Christmas, she forgot my birthday and didn't seem to care when I told her so, and I just want to be done with her at this point.

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