The son and his sister said they would help but have not. I have taken care of this woman for over a year for free, she has a valve that's closing and makes her very tired, diabetes, pace maker and isn't steady on her feet, I'm 60 married and all 3 of my children moved out and I had extra bedroom, she was living in senior housing but her two sons were on drugs and living there and she was being abused verbally, financially and her health was bad, her good son lives across the street n we've been friends for years, him and his sister said they would help with her but after we moved her in they would get mad at her and started telling me what a bad mom she was so they do not help with her, i charge her $700 a month.And I buy everything food, toiletries, etc.even her shampoo she pays for nothing, so I half to cook her meals and clean her bathroom and drive her everywere, so I am doing this all for free, she gets paid to much $$ every month for ihss unless she pays $875 a mo. Co pay.. my feelings are hurt because I've asked for help or I think I should be compensated because she is alot of work and responsibility, and rarely do i even get a thanks, his sister did once and he has a couple times, I think if they a knowledge what I do they will feel I should be paid, I promised the old lady I would never kick her out and I can't but I feel I'm being taken advantage of and I'm gonna tell am all off, but then they'll never talk to her and she has gone to dinner over there maybe 5 or 6 times in over a year.. can someone please tell me what I can do .? I've talked to all of them , asked for help, b*tched about how I don't have a life beyond her and they just won't help.. always excases, she overflowed toilet and kept flushingng it there was poop everywere sister I threw all my towels on it to keep it in bathroom ran across the street asked for help to unclog it and it took him over one and a half hours to get here, by then I used a hanger and u clogged it and was almost done cleaning it up. He said sorry was on phone with insurance Co. And that was it for me so I have ignored them since.. please someone tell me how to handle this, I think the mom talks behind my back too because people told me so I said do it again and u will move..I'm not even related and I wouldn't desert her. What is wrong with people??
You've provided a needed service for quite some time to someone who isn't a relative; her family hasn't stepped up to the plate, so it's appropriate for you to hand off the responsibility to someone who can. The frustration in your posts makes it clear that it's not healthy for you to continue.
Instead of becoming resentful, become determined. If PACE doesn't work out, you might just have to contact APS and ask to arrange for them to become involved in helping.
And start planning your new life, today.
Contact senior services in your Community and look into options for moving her to care facility. You then can return to being her friend: visiting with her, taking her out for lunch and still have your own life.