He keeps going in to have a bowel movement to see if he's done from the last time today.

So many pain meds given in hospitals and these automatically cause buildup. A bm a day is good and regular if a person eats 3 meals aday. Mom has a bm about every third day. It does not take the obsession away. The stool softener helps her not strain.

Recenly, I have heard that teens and twenty-somethings have this extremely odd habit of texting while defecating. Does anyone know of the name of this disorder, or treatment centers where I can get help for my adult children with this extremely odd malady? I'm sure there's an 800 number we loved ones can call, with operators standing by, the words, "You are not alone" floating out of their mouths, so carefully rehearsed.

After my adult children are put through the assembly line, given designer drugs for their Pharma-invented disorders, I, and taxpayers, will see the bill, and a few decades down the line when we all are disorder-free, we'll be asking why we all look alike and why we are all called by numbers and are now nameless, faceless, and voiceless.

On another note, a friend of mine was in a department store and saw an elderly woman asking to use the bathroom. This was a complete stranger. The store manager refused to allow the woman, who was clearly in need, the use of the bathroom since she had not made a purchase (she couldn't afford to make one). My friend tried to help the woman get across the street to the other bathroom "in time," but it was too late, and the woman didn't quite make it. We all know there was no logical reason not to allow this woman the use of a bathroom.

Writer Anne Lamott reminds us all to behave in front of a writer since if you don't, you might end up in her next book. As it turned out, my friend, who was the witness who helped the woman, is a poet and scholar. Afterward, she wrote a beautiful and brilliant poem on the event as she recalled it. I had the privilege of hearing her read that poem aloud some six or seven years ago. Several in the audience, upon hearing her read about the woman with poop running down her legs, were in tears.

My dad has parkinsons with dementia. Same thing..except i had him sit for urination long before this obsession due to right hand tremors and totally missing the toilet. I now have to make sure he doesn't strain and cause hemorrhoids. Not his only obsession lately. It is beginning with everything. Good luck. At least your dad is not angry. Mine is and it is sad and things said are hurtful but i know it is not the real him. Glad your dad understands that it is hard for you both..makes working together easier. Peace and hugs.

I think older people often take medicine and don't walk much. BM do get harder for them to produce and they almost never drink enough water. Encourage drinking water. If possible, have them walk as much as possible...even with a walker. Check those medicines. Some do make you constipated. Eat more green leafy vegetables, eat more of any kind of vegetables. And if medicines allow , have a beer every now and then. It does help.

I'm terribly sorry to hear about a department store denying someone a bathroom for a basic human function. Had I been that woman, I would've just gone on the floor send a strong message, Then leave the mess for them to clean up

Yes that store story makes me angry.Human compassion is sadly lacking in the world.

You sound like a precious caregiver!

Yes, my mother went from worrying if she could go to saying no more to products to assist the go!

Yes, it is an obsession for many elderly people!

Every time I visited my husband in the nursing home, he mentioned his bowel movements. Examples: "It's coming out now. (It wasn't.) They put a pad under me." This was one of the things he talked about the last time I saw him alive. It distressed me to hear it. I was happy that before I left that day, he asked me to lower the bed rail so I could lean over and kiss him. I did.

My mother who has Alzheimer's spends more time on the toilet than she does sitting on the couch! She is obsessed with sitting on it. My brothers and I have walked in to check on her at different times and there she is sleeping. Prior to Alzheimer's she never had bathroom issues.

Oy. For one thing, they don't usually eat as much as they used to, or eat 'healthy'. My mother had a list of about a dozen things she enjoyed, I had to cook or buy all her food. She loved her bananas and fruit-in-jello!...anyway, she was taking iron pills because anemic, and then she was plugged up, so taking stool softeners. Plus many other pills. Then she got a prolapsed rectum, freaking out a couple home health aids, and often severe bleeding. Off to the proctologist, who said after 4, yes, 4 different trips, she could just 'live with it'. He had nothing to say about the constipation except 'stop giving mom the iron pills' (recomended by her g.p.) Oh, it was quite a mess, in more ways than one!

Lassie --

Yes, it is frustrating when doctors don't give detailed recommendations.

Lassie, that's one of the problems having specialists and a gp. Sometimes they are not in agreement. So, (rhetorical question) what's a caregiver to do? Neurologist says Hubby doesn't need cholesterol meds because of his age. GP was not too happy with that response. Hubby is still on cholesterol meds.

my father would obsess about it before going into nursing home. I think because he always had one every day and figured it should continue. I tried telling him that IF you don't eat enough, there is nothing to come out. and as he got more into the dementia he ate less but still thought he should go everyday, he would use the enema's etc to help him go and would get frustrated if he didn't. not everyone goes 1 time a day. sometimes I go 2 or 3 and other times I might miss a day. I have even heard people go for 4 or 5 days without having a BM......I guess everyone's digestion is different.

Is he having regular bowel movements? Are you sure there's not a medical issue?