For those who have had parents in skilled nursing rehab in a nursing home or there for long term care, how did it effect you emotionally?
Mom just came home today but I still have the sights, sounds and smells on my mind. If I could describe it in one word it would be, ‘depressing.’ But we all know it is sometimes necessary. Not totally depressing though.
I’m grateful for what was done right. Upset and a bit confused about what is done wrong. I suppose short staffed and being underpaid is the primary reason for flaws. Some workers pull double shifts or work two jobs to survive. Let’s face it. They have a demanding and challenging job.
Even though I experienced depression. I also felt other strong emotions, such as an overwhelming caring for the elderly. Yes, my primary reason for being there was to see my own mother but I realized how many residents had no children, other family or friends visiting and I became so very sad.
Some days were more active, like Saturday and Sunday afternoon. There were more visitors on weekends. Many approached me and I befriended them for a short time before visiting mom. Some were upbeat and pleasant, others unaware of everything, some frustrated and angry, some were lonely, etc. I felt emotions I didn’t expect to have. It also made me think of myself aging and how it may be for me personally.
I met a few volunteers and they were terrific. They played music, helped feed the residents with ALZ and various other things.
Have any any of you been effected deeply after your loved one has been in a home or do you tune it out and only pay attention to your family member? Have any of you volunteered after a loved one passed on or are still living at the facility? If so, how have you volunteered?
Also, I brought individual ice cream cups for mom to enjoy. I had their permission to do so. Some residents wanted some too. I made sure they could have it and passed a few out to them. Is this okay to do, or frowned upon? Would it be okay to go occasionally and bring treats?
Also, do some residents forget that they had dinner? Many ate dinner but went to get a sandwich to eat also. Is this commonly done? The workers gave out sandwiches and even cookies to them after their dinner. My mom never did that but mom isn’t a big eater. She’s small and doesn’t eat large portions of food.