I am sure this has been experienced by thousands on this site alone, leave alone hundreds of thousands in the world. But to watch a father who was so capable, so vibrant and robust, so intelligent, and to see him get to the point where you have to feed him spoons full of food and liquid like a baby is so excruciating. I guess there are not good diseases, not sure I would prefer to watch my dad die of cancer, but sometimes this is more than I can take. I try to go to the MC most every day but sometimes I just need to stay away for a day for my own sanity, yet hard not to feel guilt. Sometimes I try to take a saving grace in thinking because of his incognizance, he is not as aware of his predicament as we are. Sometimes we come and visit and leave and it doesn't appear to matter to him. Today, my mom was there and tried to leave and he grasped her trying to keep her from leaving. As said, millions have gone through this so who am I to gripe about it? My dad could fix anything, build anything, do anything much better than I could. A year and a half ago he beat me in golf (not a huge accomplishment). I could hit further but he had the coordination to hit more accurate, now he is wheeled around and needs a hoyer lift to get from chair to bed. I guess there is no question here. Just so heartbroken for my dad. If there is a question, could it be true that he is not suffering as much as those watching him decline? If that was true, we would not be suffering as much.