Other people behaving badly...

Not so much people behaving badly, as one person making the sort of mistake that could happen to anyone.

And only care-related in that this happened at a school for children with special needs.

But I love this story:

Christine Lee, assistant principal at St Anne's Community Special School in Welton, East Yorkshire, said: "A busload of Zulu warriors was very unexpected. They said 'St. Anne's?' and we said 'yes, but we weren't expecting you.'

The eight warriors then realised they were 200 miles off course for their scheduled performance at St. Ann's School for children with learning difficulties in West London. But rather than board their bus again they decided to perform their war dance and songs for the pupils.

Lesley Davis, head teacher, said "They did two performances, one for the lower school pupils and an hour in the afternoon for the upper school. The children were just glued, it was fantastic."

Mduduzi Mkize, the troupe's leader, said "The addresses got mixed up on my data sheet and we ended up here. They had never heard of us. So I spoke to them, explaining what we do, and they fell in love with the idea and wanted to see what I was talking about."

I'm just a bit sorry for the teachers and pupils in West London who *were* expecting a busload of Zulu warriors to arrive at their school. Perhaps they re-booked for another day.

Thank-you Countrymouse. I don't feel like a hero but I'll proudly wear the cape. Now I just need to find a phone booth somewhere to go change into it. :)

Gershun, I don't care whether you did it in the throes of delirium or not, you are my hero.

Oh my God I WISH I could find the courage and the words to tell my sister what I think of her!

But that's what it comes down to, isn't it. You explain, with concrete illustrations, why you feel you have been bullied, slighted and misrepresented. She instantly comes back with a response that aims to bully, slight and misrepresent you.

The prosecution rests.

Gershun,
It is never stupid to want a connection with family.
It's just some family are narcs and dangerous to your health.
It is truth you are trying to figure out with your fam.
Be careful.
We all try to go back, test the waters on occasion.

Go in with your armor on, if ever.

It's not you, it's them behaving badly.

You feel bad enough already, so protect yourself.
Don't answer when that phone rings....

Driving hubs tonight. While I am gone, everyone try try to get along. I can't be warning of the full moon effect every month! It's not you, it's them!

Thank-you Willie! I'm trying hard but one thing that is making it hard is I suffer a lot from insomnia and getting proper rest is number one when trying to get over mono.
I get an hour here, an hour there but really am not sleeping well still. I feel pretty rough.

But yes, I will save those e-mails for a good laugh if nothing else. Thanks!

I'd save all those emails Gershun, as evidence if for no other reason. At least you got it all out in the open.
Mono, isn't it funny that we were all just discussing the possibility of Ali having that? I prescribe lots of rest and vitamins, feel better soon!

Enjoying the new thread Send! Good job!

So........I have mononucleosis.........yes........the kissing disease. But what's not so funny is I honestly think I may have had a bit of delirium, no lie. I was running a fever two nights ago and sent an e-mail to my narc sister telling her that I haven't appreciated her treatment of me the last 55 years. We then proceeded to have an e-mail conversation or should I say I had a conversation............she just deflected, denied, managed to turn things around to where my lack of perception, different communication skills are the problem. That I have shown her a lack of respect by letting things go for 55 years and that I am not allowed to bring up anything that didn't just happen yesterday. Yes.............I really must be delirious. What was I thinking? I went on line and read an excellent article about why confronting a narcissist about their narcissism and expecting an apology is akin to sticking your head into a crocodile and expecting it not to clamp it's jaws shut on your stupid head.

Next time I'm feeling delirious I'll come on here and someone can give me a pep talk before I go and do something stupid again.

Poor staff at the hoca last night as 2 or 3 caregivers called off last minute - grr

Who showed up - the 3 or 4 veterans who always work hard - and one or two who are newish and were sitting in the tv room quite a bit

The place was so crowded as they corralled all the residents in the tv room that I took mom outside so we could be quiet and catch some fireworks

One newer nurse came out to Ask if I'd seen a certain male resident - same one that told me she hadn't seen mom when I called one evening- comforting

When we returned inside for pie and ice cream there were still a few residents up so I changed the channel to NBC so
at least they could see some fireworks too

Even though staff came to help me put mom to bed I told her to
Take a break - she had enough to do that night plus she's the only one who has made a connection with mom and now showers her 2x a week

Temps are forecast at 102 for the weekend and once again the a/c is broken in mom's room which is less than 2 years old

Management sent out a two page letter addressing parking rules and guests, drunk in public, etc.
Dated: July 5th.
Barn door was left open. Lol.

Nope, can't win here. You're right. Several years ago I had this same sort of venom directed at me from the same brother and his wife. It ate me up because my brother and I used to be very close. To repair the rift, I chose to practice Teshuva and apologize for my part in the conflict. It was successful . . . for a while.

I thought I'd pass on it, thanks, MsMadge! Bleuch.

Barbara, one of my brothers managed to arrange a vacation overseas and missed my mother's 90th. What could I say? Her birthday had been in the diary, after all, since 1924; but evidently it came as a surprise to him that we'd decided to celebrate it.

My mother barely noticed his absence; and as her dementia worsened he was the one child of four that she at times completely forgot she had. I don't know if that's better or worse than minding that he wasn't there.

But as to what to say to your brothers... I don't think you can win in this situation, can you? All you can do is refuse to feel responsible.

CM
how was the cuttlefish and toast ?

When I walked into the hospital room one morning when Mother was in Again,she was Livid and I couldn't imagine what was wrong.She said that she was asleep,and at 3:30 in the morning,a group of students and a nurse appeared at her bed and the nurse teaching the students showed how to put in and take out a cathedar on Mother who wasn't even using a cathedar at all.She was so upset and humiliated and never got over it.

Stopped into a chain hardware store today to get a new outdoor shade for the patio slider
Couldn't find any so
I asked - - they didn't have them anymore
Said they had window tint instead
This is not helpful hardware men

I was here, but have to remind dH to stop working at 1:30, and it is already 1:45. He loves it so, but they frown on him making his own hours.

Mom will notice, and it will make her sad that all of her kids are not there. But she won't know why, and I'm not going to tell her that her youngest son is not speaking to his brother again. Nor am I going to make excuses for him. This same thing happened to mess up my parents' 50th wedding anniversary celebration 20 years ago. I understand that sometimes people don't get along, but put on your big boy pants and show up for your mom. It's all about celebrating her life.

I'm sorry, Barbara. I understand your brother's feelings on one level. But if I had to grit my teeth and grin and bear my siblings at my mother's 90th I don't see why he should get away with it! And it must be extremely trying for you. Will your mother notice, and mind?

My younger brother texted that he will not come to our mom's 90th birthday party at my home because he doesn't want to be around his older brother who will be here, and that he and his wife will come to see mom at some other time. I am so tired of this nonsense.

Blimey Veronica! Definitely a 'gobsmacked' moment! - I hoped you checked those meds over carefully, who knows what she might have sneaked in there???

CM does buying a TV mean you are behaving badly?

Cwillie it is now 10.20 and I too am still in my nighty. Yes I do still wear nighties rather than the shorts and T shirts others favor.

In rehab the medication nurse whom I labeled the medication N***i.
After I had complained to admin next time she came round she slapped my meds down and said "Nice doing business with you"

On the other side of the coin I was in Walmart yesterday dangerously cruising around in one of their uncontrollable carts and wanted a new hair curler. I parked, if you can call it that, and was looking. A nearby assistant came up and offered to help me find it. Not everyone behaves badly!!!!!!!!

Love this new thread Send

Aww, I was just about to suggest that we could all queue up to slap the hysterical nurse, like that scene in Airplane! Let me at 'er...

I nearly got a red mist moment at the electrical warehouse yesterday. But the "assistant" was so unbelievably useless I ended up feeling too sorry for him to say my piece. That, and I honestly didn't know where to start.

Me: "so what does that figure for the Hz on the tv specifications actually mean?"
Him: "er... it's more expensive?"

You know that moment where you're not sure if they're taking the piss - I looked at him narrowly. He looked defeated, and went on to complain that most people don't insist on getting into that much detail. Then why quote the figure?

Boy's an idiot. I'll buy a tv somewhere else. Eventually.

It's 8:30 and I am still in my nightie sitting at the computer and thinking up excuses for not getting dressed and going out for exercise.... again. Is that bad enough?

Everybody else, but me is behaving badly right now.
But they won't confess.

So sorry, I feel that I have made a mistake joking about hitting someone at all. When one turns on the news and reruns of our commander-in-chief is promoting same, I must in good conscience reject that kind of humor.
I apologize, and sincerely never meant to spread that kind of behaving badly.
Good thoughts everyone!

JJGood, Your way is okay, (behaving well but thinking), lol.

Sendhelp, now that's funny! This evening Mom was agitated, so I called to see who the nurse on duty was, but it wasn't Nurse Excitable.

JJGOOD,
Move over, maybe I want to hit her, Lol.

Oops, this is not the Caregivers Behaving Badly thread, and I don't hit people. So maybe some Other People Behaving Badly can hit that histrionic nurse.

Lol. They're not allowing physical restraints anymore, are they?
For the nurse, I mean.

Other people behaving badly: the one nurse at my Moms Memory Care home who's all excited and exclaiming how she's convinced my Mom is going to hit her. (The rest of the staff is wonderful and seem to have a clue how to work with and respond to upset, escalating dementia patients.)

Me (behaving well but thinking) "lady, you work in a home with 60 dementia patients, this is your career, how are you acting offended and excitable and like a drama queen? You almost sound like you want her to hit you...what ARE you up to?"

I feel like apologizing for him too. But, no.

Ff, are you in Canada or the UK? Lol.