Other people behaving badly...

The carpet men were coming to clean the carpet and they phoned to tell us they were on the way, 2 hours early,at noon instead of 2:00 p.m.My dH knew I was trying to gather the 5 cats to put them in Mother's bedroom before the men got there,so what does he do.......he gets a step ladder and shaves off the top of the door that's been sticking,getting wood shavings all over the carpet I had just vacuumed and he let the cats into the Living room that they aren't allowed to go and it caused ALOT of unnessessary chaos I sure didn't need.Or want.And the timing of everything stunk.

That's why I want to torture them, Frazzled - I want to get to the bottom of whether this is inability to write a meaningful sentence, or the more sinister possibility outlined by Sir Humphrey Appleby of intentional obscurity.

He explained all this in the episode called 'Open Government.' "Always put the difficult bit in the title, it does less damage there."

So, for example, if you come across a document entitled "delivering better health care for all", whereas the casual reader might assume that means a discussion of how the government aims to do so, on careful reading you will find that the document:

avoids definition of "delivering" "better" "health care" and "all"
makes unexplained assumptions about the desiderata of health care, some of them highly arguable
and says that they're already doing it brilliantly and any problems are the result either of unfair perception or unforeseeable setbacks
and says that anyway it's not their job.

Sheesh, with a first paragraph that convoluted, I'd hate to see what the rest of the document looks like. The government never can make anything simple. Ours here can't either.

Read this. If you can.

"This report examines the Home Office’s progress in managing a clear assurance and oversight system that is effective in identifying risk and financial pressure, uses information on the demand for and cost of police services to inform funding allocations, and supports forces to be financially sustainable by facilitating transformation and enabling forces to make savings."


Daughter 1 remarked last weekend that I am becoming increasingly intolerant. Given that this introductory paragraph *of a public document* has me contemplating driving up to London, chaining up the National Audit Office's entire editorial department and setting fire to their toes, I suppose D1 may have a point.

I don't know how these badly behaving people find us,but they do.
We have some trees that need trimmed and 1 that needs to be cut down and this man offered to do the whole job for only $300.00,so my dH went for it and decided to go with this man.We thought he'd be back last night,but he never came and again,my dH hoped he'd come this morning,but he didn't.He finally showed up at 1:30 this afternoon and after some chit chat,he told my dH he had to take the woman in his truck somewhere and that he always got half the pay due for his work beforehand.My dH said "Well not from me" and the man left saying he'd be back in a little while.It's been 6 hours now,and he never came back,but it's just as well because I googled him on my computer and the Neighborhood website too and found bad report after bad report on him and his work and how he'd taken money and tools from people and there was also an arrest record and he had been arrested for attempting to steal a car AND I found out that it's a Family business and this junk has been going on for years.
I had a bad gut feeling anyway and now I know why And I think my Mother was trying to send me a sign too,because there was a female Cardinal outside my window chirping Loudly,like it was trying to get my attention.
I'll never understand how people can do such bad things and still continue to live with themselves.It's sad.Really sad.

LuckyLu,
I got a ticket 1 block from my house too-probably 20 years ago. Bad thing was.....I was stopped dead at the stop sign, no rolling.

Well, I don't mind paying the price when I'm wrong but I'm not about to put up with being accused when I'm innocent. So I argued with the cop and he backed off.
I asked how many seconds do I need to sit there after the tires stop. He couldn't tell me.

I'll be Darned if you're going to meet your quota on me!
⚠️👮🏼😜

MsMadge...I got a ticket for a "Rolling stop" a block from home,years ago.Since then,I always count to 3 at a stop.
Cops still hide here at churches and certain places  ready to catch someone,They have to meet their quota....

Send

i nearly chased a car down the street on Labor Day- blew through the corner stop sign going 40+

if I hadn't slowed to greet a neighbor then I would have likely gotten it

only thing that stopped me was that I was already running late

when I was a kid, motorcycle cops would park on certain streets and wait for folks to not come to a complete stop - California roll

I can't remember the last time I've even seen a motor cop, and now when anything happens, every cop car in the city appears on the scene

can an you get the city to put up an extra stop sign before your house ?

A piece of board, good idea.
Must consider the consequences first, but thanks Sue for the good ideas!

I don't want to make the papers, ya know.

Send,
I know it's a long shot but could you petition for speed bumps on your street?

Or "somehow" a 1"X 1" wood pole happens to have fallen right near your driveway?

Can the city put in a speed sensor? They put them in the neighborhood where I work.

Cameras?

Be grateful you don't drive here in TJ. On a 4 lane road going one way, the guy in the left hand lane turns RIGHT across 3 lanes of traffic going straight!!!! I swear they don't care about their lives or any one else's.

And don't get me started with the babies on their mother's laps! Aaaahhhhh!
Oh well, one gets thrown out the window, you can always have another one. Really p*sses me off.

Really do not know what to do when they are speeding to the right of me, just before I need to turn right. I have missed my turn because of them. This has been as early as ten p.m.! I usually take my foot off the accelerator and slow, hoping they will find an alternate plan. Then, they pass on the left, weaving, almost clipping my front end when they swerve back into my lane. I even put my emergency blinkers on!

Stunt driving is dealt with pretty harshly here - immediate impound and licence suspension for 7 days plus $2000 fine and impound and towing fees - and it has really had an impact on the amount of street racing.

Where I live, it has been reported in the L.A area about dangerous street racing.
Now, it appears some are speeding and weaving down our main street out front, making it dangerous to turn into our driveway. No where near the streets of L.A. our community is changing!

The majority are BMW drivers. Hot newer cars. Graduates from high school?

Wish I could get my hands on some legal spike strips, but then, that would be a stupid vigilante response to a dangerous threat that the sheriff can handle. But I can dream, can't I? Wishing that I were more powerful to change what's wrong in the world. I think I need a protector, soon.

You are right Sue, the ocean's tides are a factor in influencing human behavior. Especially, imo, in sensitive individuals. The human body is 70% water, as you know, and the brain is 75% water.

"The Moon's Effect on Ocean Tides: The gravitational pull of the Moon and the Sun makes the water in the oceans bulge, causing a continuous change between high and low tide. ... While both the Moon and the Sun influence the ocean tides, the Moon plays the biggest role because it is so much closer to our planet than the Sun."

I can imagine that "gravitational pull" might simply affect our body's water balance.
This is surely too simplified, but something happens, for sure at the full moon. imo.

I've said it too. The full moon brings 'um out to howl.
I worked night shift (12mid-8am) for 10 years. I also was on the "Code Team" all those 10 years. Many more violent admissions coming in through ER and the patients on the wards would really act up on a full moon. I'd give more pain medication those nights than other non-moon nights.
And the alcoholics going through the DT's! They would be wild! Leather restraints on wrists and ankles with almost superhuman strength. Oh what fun back in the "good ol' days"!

We would check our schedules, then the calendar
to see if we worked on the full moon.

I also believe the ocean tides have an influence on human behavior (in conjunction with the moon), too.

Annon,
Maybe it was your patient's birthday and he was going out to dinner with Jesus in his 'birthday suit'. 😝

Oh, I know, corny, huh? 🌽

Anonymous439773,
That is exactly what Becky would say whenever we all talk about the full moon!

I used to always end up doing psych intakes on the full moon in the ER. Three ring circus. I had one patient who always got picked up by the police wandering around a residential area, naked, hiding out from the CIA or waiting for Jesus to pick him up for dinner.

MsMadge,
With the heat, tempers are short.
The full moon (days before) aggressive behaviors in facilities increase. It is a poorly acknowledged, but well known fact.

Do anything necessary to prevent harm and distress to your Mom. Calling the sherriff or police on their non-emergency number, explaining the situation when it starts to escalate can help them be close by ahead of time, then feel free to call or have anyone call 911 when the breakout or violence occurs.

Of course, under the circumstances, you and her caregivers should be prepared to use pepper spray to stop an assault on you or Mom. This all may sound like the nuclear option, but the old days are over and the staff or police won't always be there to protect you from others behaving badly.

You always have the option or risk to make a report to the ombudsman, and/or threatening lawsuit to the admin or DON.

If all else fails, call 911 for Mom, have her taken to the nearest E.R. for chest pains and the palpitations she is having. When paramedics arrive, they will know what to do about the disturbing party. imo. If not, your Mom won't be there.

So sorry you have this stress. Arm yourself with the spray, or do not go to the common areas for awhile.

Scary, I know. Be wise and prepared. Your concerns are real, so do not doubt
yourself.

It seems as though younger, stronger, more violent people are becoming a big problem in long term care, sometimes they end up there by default because there are no psychiatric hospitals any more or they have aged out of group homes. They can't be sedated or restrained so they are free to mingle among those who are frail and helpless - ticking time bombs.

That can't be a good environment in a memory care place, Madge. I would think that other residents would feel the tension in the air and it would make them feel unsettled themselves. :-/

Is it one resident that's having combative issues many times over, or is it several different ones?

I feel for ya.

Edit: "particular resident" sounds like one person. Hrm.

I’m getting increasingly frustrated with the amount of aggressive behavior hoca is allowing to occur in common areas

this seems like such a no win situation for everyone - the family, the resident, the staff, the other residents

no one wants to see anyone taken out on a 72 hour hold but I’ve been tempted twice now to call 911 when I’m visiting mom and staff can’t get a particular resident under control

Since we don't have A/C at home, I will be conserving electricity by only having one fan running at a time. Hubs does the laundry in the morning so he's not in "peak usage" hours. I refuse to give up my computer or TV so someone else can use MY electricity allotment.

Actually, I don't remember Mexico ever saying anything about conserving at certain times. They've got this weird system-if you use more than the "minimum" amount, your rate is bumped up and you pay at the higher rate for a YEAR! Very bad if you move into a house and the former tenants had high usage. If you have lowered your usage during the year they will lower it.

Somehow my MIL has the lowest bill I've ever heard of-around $17. for 2 months! But no lights or fans on in her house. The other day, with sweat rolling down my neck, I asked her if the ceiling fan still worked (It's an old house). She said "Yes" and continued with the conversation. 😥

I'm NOT going to try to sleep without my ceiling fan, even if I have to pay more. 😅

Don't forget to conserve power between 5 and 9 pm - when it's really hot 😂

Is it me? Or is everyone else behaving badly?

I was enjoying posting more easily on this new website. It is working! I thought.
Then, I all of a sudden could not post a "like" this. Kept trying. Oh NO!

Here I was, trying to post "like" on my own post again. Lol.

Only 5 days until a full moon, the heat, it is all getting to me.

Every day it feels like my husband is acting badly and if he truly wanted to have his own mother in a facility it would have happened. I feel like my hands are tied and the key along with the pens can't be found!

Skip the fancy party clothes (it sounds more like a blue jean event) and/or hire a taxi CM!

Need to vent where I can't hurt anyone's feelings.

My dearest dearest friend turns sixty next month. She is very excited about the party she has organised.

- Aside. The shenanigans from a few months ago seem to have fizzled out. Whether Friend and Other (then) Uninvited Friend sorted it out, or they have jointly and severally stopped caring, I do not know. Fine by me as long as I don't have to hear another word.

Anyway. As the venue for this date, which she entreats us all to attend, Friend has chosen a picturesque old pub on the banks of the Thames. It is a three mile walk - at midday, in July, in party gear - along a towpath from the nearest station. Driving to it on a Sunday lunchtime... I don't want to think about it, much less talk. She warns that the garden looks on to unfenced steep banks over the river, which will be - I quote - "VERY DANGEROUS for small children (or tipsy guests!!!)." Entertainment will be provided by a clown of our acquaintance (a retired professor of sociology, but the clowning was more lucrative) and, I quote again, her "favourite comedy songsters."

I think she is trying to find out whether any of us loves her enough to go.

MsMadge,
Please carry jello and applesauce in a small cooler in your car, eat before going to the store. This because you work too hard, too long, and might need to share some with your Mom in an emergency.
Never feel bad for having to say no to a fellow customer.

CM,
"In the London suburbs, this isn't a hanging offence. It's a public-whipping-and-then-burning-at-the-stake offence."

Yeah, I agree, he shoulda been whipped publically and then burned at the stake! LOL.
Really am enjoying these confessions CM. Got any more?

😂