How do I learn to change the way I feel about caring for my mom? I'm only 55, I have more than a full-time job, and I'm so tethered to my mom existence now.. My mom is in my house, vulnerable, demanding, impolite to me (not others), and she needs a lot of care - the only thing she can do for herself is wipe her nose and eat. If she's cool or warm at nighttime she doesn't adjust her blankets - she grunts until someone comes - you'd think someone was killer her. She has dementia. She's not my mother any more. I know in relationship she is my mother, but I don't feel like she's my mother - I feel like she's an intruder and I am a hostage.
How do I look at things differently??? I am the one with the problem. I know she can't help herself. What do you do to make it work?