I want to say hello to others who are facing the same or similar challenges I am facing with my mother. Compared to many people's stories, I believe my experience is more positive than negative at this point, but it's good to be aware of the changes that may occur down the road as my mother's dementia progresses.
My mother has had a couple episodes in the past five years of strokes. After the strokes occurred she began to exhibit memory loss. We were told she had a mini stroke and would recover without permanent damage, however she does have short term memory loss. Actually I am now wondering if she was exhibiting some sort of dementia as long as I can remember. She has always gone down memory lane, repeating her stories of her life growing up and as a young adult to me hundreds of times. No matter if I would remind her then (and I'm talking back when I was a young adult myself and she no where near elderly) that I already knew the story--she would continue to tell her stories over and over. I would often think she needed a new person to hear her stories as I knew them all by heart myself. Things have not changed now that she is 86 years old. Still hearing those same stories.
After her strokes, my brother and I have encouraged my mom to move closer to one of us, and she would consider it, but change her mind. Finally, this spring, she decided it was time to move. She is now living in an independent living facility only five minutes from my home. With her living so close to my husband and me, I am now front and center of what her life is really like now. Living six hours away my brother and I both knew she was declining mentally, has been for years, even before her strokes, but we were not as aware as we are now. Now I am much more aware of her decline on a day to day basis. Sometimes she will say something that really blows my mind! Not too often fortunately!
This is all new to me and I'm learning to adjust to having my mother living close by. I am taking each day as it comes. I've seen role reversals in our mother/daughter relationship, but I have to remember my mother will always be my mother. I've made mistakes along the way, but I'm learning and adapting. For the most part, my mother is doing so much better living here than she was doing living six hours away. She was declining physically as well as mentally before she moved here. She's healthier and seems content in her new apartment. It's good to see the positive improvements.
Thanks for reading my comments here. No questions yet, just wanted to touch base. The questions will come no doubt!