This is from the Caregivers Support Study at Orcasinc. I'm posting it here to help anyone who might be struggling with not being able to control negative thoughts..it's really helpful information.
There are different types of negative thoughts – those that are healthy concerns and those that are unhelpful.
Managing your negative thoughts isn’t about forcing yourself to be happy and positive all the time. A normal life isn’t perfect and everyone struggles sometimes. Thinking and talking about your healthy concerns can help you understand them and find solutions. Unhelpful thoughts, on the other hand, tend to be exaggerated. They make you feel worse and get in the way of problem solving. It’s important to react differently to healthy concerns and unhelpful thoughts.
Exaggerate the negative side of a situation
Make you feel worse
Get in the way of enjoying good times
Make it harder for you to see ways you can solve the problem
May lead you to misinterpret a situation—if you are looking for the negative in a situation it may lead you to think something is wrong, and you may start to worry
Allow you to recognize and accept negative feelings: “I feel sad today.”
Help you admit that you need time for yourself: “Sometimes I need a break from my family member.”
Send you an accurate signal about what upsets you: “I get frustrated when my family member doesn’t listen to me.”
Reflect the reality of the situation: “I’m not a bad caregiver, I’m just tired.”