I'm the sole caregiver for my mom and s-dad. My mom is getting progressivly worse very fast. Her drivers license was just taken away. She has multiple health issues, physically and emotionally. I'm on disability myself for multiple chronic pain conditions and have severe pain 24/7/365. My pain is getting much worse, as is the depression and anxiety. All I want to do is sleep...all day and night. I have no life of my own at all. I'm not allowed to have "friends" into their house. My mother doesn't seem to care that I'm in pain and has a list of things for me to do most every day. My back feels broken. I'm starting to have much worse pain and can barely function myself. I don't care about things anymore. I don't do anything for enjoyment. I have too much pain to go out, except when I must go out for groceries, etc...for them. My mom see's me crying in pain, short of breath, sweating, etc... b/c the pain is so bad. Yet, she doesn't seem to care. I've called the Office of Aging, Seniors Helping Seniors, etc... anywhere and anyone I thought could help. But since my mom refuses any outside help, I'm totally alone. I feel my own health declining fast and fear that my life will be cut short b/c of trying to keep up with all of the demands, errands, housekeeping, constant laundry, etc... I just can't do it anymore and don't know where to turn. My mom's dr. told her that she MUST go to PT. Her first appt. was s/p to be today. She cancelled it and said she won't go. She won't help herself and is so stubborn. I don't matter. I'm alone. I have no money to leave. I feel like I need an Intervention b/c of the serious situation I find myself in. Any idea's of what I can do to get help? I cannot continue to clean, etc... I have barely enough money to pay my own bills, but want to get someone to come in to clean, etc... I'm on strong pain meds and an antidepressant, but they don't seem to be working. I feel so so trapped. I need friends who understand all we go through as caregivers and all of our own lives that we must give up. I need to keep in touch with others like myself b/c I feel like I'm going to lose my mind and fear my own health going downhill fast.
Thanks everyone. I thank God for this group and all of you!