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worriedincalif, I am so sorry that the thieves had the nerve to take that special picture frame. I would report it to the head of the cemetery. When my dad passed we bought a beautiful red candle holder we lit every holiday. The holder was deep into the ground and we had it for almost 18 years. It was stolen. I have not purchased another one as of yet , not sure if I will. Two years ago around Christmas thieves stole my purse off my mothers w/c while shopping for Christmas presents. I had special photos in my wallet and other important things as well as about $2,000. I usually don't carry that much cash but was paying a bill that my brother charged on my charge account for truck repair. I was furious, got the police involved, looked at the surveillance camera at Macy's but no luck, camera was not in the back of the store. Macy's did nothing and we were very good customers. We do not shop at that store any longer but we shop for most of our items now at JCP and feel more comfortable. My problem is I trust too much, now I carry my debit only when shopping and look out for thieves. Again so sorry this happened to your family.
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Wow, my 1st visit on this sight, and 1st thing I read. (Probably the”Whine”). And it seems to be my current life story. Life revolving around someone else’s 3meals
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Cali,

That’s awful! So sorry.

People have stolen at our cemetery too. Even the flowers.
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Cali,

I'm so sorry that someone would do that!! I guess there's accounting for the depths that people will sink to! But stealing from a gravesite is as low as it gets!!

How wonderful that you make a special event of decorating MILs headstone!! It's heartwarming!!

Hang in there!! (((Hugs)))
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Jodi, I think most of us agree with you!!

My whine moment today.....today I went to visit my MIL & decorate her headstone for christmas and SOME STUPID THIEVING GRINCH!!!! Has stolen the special outdoor picture frame from her grave!! Who in the world does that??? It is a simple handmade frame that my husband stained & it is secured to the ground by a stake, it does not fall over and cannot blow away. It has been there for 2.5 years and I go out to the cemetery today and it is gone! So that was very very upsetting especially when my husband confirmed that no one in the family has taken it & I had to tell them the picture is gone. The picture inside was of my MIL and her 6 siblings posing together in the late 1980s-yes big poofy hair, leather jackets, tight jeans. Great picture. But if it really was stolen, I am sure it wasn’t for the picture LOL!
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Xray,
Couldn't had said it any better.
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Jodi......which reminds me of when my mother says, "I know I shouldn't say this BUT...." Then goes on to say it, as if prefacing the statement with the 'I Know I Shouldn't BUT' bit of B.S. makes it ok. Kind of like adding a Blessing onto a Curse, huh? 😑
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Jodi,

Yep! It’s truly sickening. It’s also sickening that a few people support their nonsense and attack others who call them out. They are hypocrites too!

I hope that you don’t get nasty private messages filled with lies and foolishness like I did.

I know my heart and that is what matters the most.

I respect how you feel. It’s sad to see that certain posts are not deleted by the moderators. I report them as soon as I see them. I know others do too.

Sometimes I wonder if they are even legitimate posters due to the content of the messages.

I also hate the patronizing, condescending, self righteous, attitude too! The ‘blessing’ at the end is unnerving.

I wonder how often they polish their halo! Hahaha
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My "Whine Moment " today is people that reply to posts with a healthy serving of condescendtion peppered with judgment then topped with a dollop of blessings (as if that makes everything ok!!)

As a Christian, it makes me sad to realize that this is the very reason some people think Christians are hypocrites!!
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(((((Bridger))))) such good news that you all have weathered the storm and come out ok.

((((((Pam)))) so happy for you all. Yay - a competent and compassionate professional for your mum!!!!

.
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Pam, wonderful news. I bet you feel some relief. I am so happy for your mom and you. Wishing both of you a healthy and Happy New Year. Hugs.
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Pam,
That is great news! It sounds like everyone is on the same page with you. That's awesome!!
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Great news, Pam! She must be glad to be home.

I find NP’s to be extremely knowledgeable and caring.
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well today we got some good news,, didn;t see the Dr who spends exactly 3 minutes with mom,, we saw his new NP ! She was awesome, and said mom was back to her pre hospital baseline, and her heart is no worse than it was if we just keep an eye on her weight and the new meds seem to be helping! No mention of surgury, and she and I have a video call in 3 weeks ( she actually understood about mom's confusion,, YAY! ) More bloodwork in 2 weeks, then maybe they can cut back on the diuretic to her last levels. She also agreed with me its no where near time to be discussing hospice or such.
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Bridger
So glad you have your family back at home and that you and your one son made it through the valley without Covid attacking. This disease is baffling. Thanks for keeping us up to date.
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Yay! Bridger. Great news! 😊
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Finally....everyone has had the follow up COVID test and negative. Dad is back home...hopefully no trips back to assisted living.
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Pam,
I am sorry to read that you are going through so much. I had to find my own mother a new cardiologist because her old one wanted her to have surgery and my mother kept telling him "no" so then he tried to get me to talk my mother into it, of course, I told him "no." I explained to him that my mother has had 19 surgeries, yes, you read it correctly and she fought 2 kinds of cancers and one of them twice. My mother told me back in 2012 after her last surgery that she was done, no more surgeries, no more Tx, no feeding tube because she had one for 6 months after her 2012 surgery and she hated it, no CPR she is done. She sign a DNR as well. Her new cardiologist respect her wishes.

I wish you the best of luck. It gets tired some to have to explain your mom's wishes. You'll have to stand your ground. I know you will!!

Hugs!!
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Oh, Pam, I just read the below. I am so sorry with all you are going through; sounds like the whole hospital has moved in; do let them know that's what it FEELS like. It's an invasion. I hope it gets better.
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Pam,

In our home health program a social worker wasn’t sent out.

A registered nurse oversaw the entire situation.

That’s interesting.

Oh my gosh, that is ridiculous to even consider surgery at her age.

My mom’s doctor told her that surgery was not an option for any problem at her age.

Your mom would never agree to that! Nor would you! That is just crazy.
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I dont mind the RN or OT, mom is doing her exercises ,, PT cancelled after 1 visit because she was already doing her stuff. OT is only coming one more time. Its the SW that weirds me out.. like they think we are pressuring her to be DNR And her cardiologist tomorrow keeps bringing up surgury.. as if she would survive it? At least I'll get that out of the way tomorrow hopefully.
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Oh Pam (((((((hugs)))))) hope you get it al sorted out and things settle down soon. Sometimes "help" isn't help at all. Poor mum,
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Polar,

When I had home health I was told that I had to participate in the entire program, which consists of occupational therapy, physical therapy, nurse and aide.

This was fine for us because my mom participated and benefited from all of it.

That’s great that you were able to select only what you needed.

It’s exhausting for elderly parents. I had asked if mom could skip either OT or PT instead of doing both. They told me, “No, the program Is designed to work using both OT and PT.”
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Pam - my mother was hospitalized and then released a couple of months ago. The hospital SW arranged for PT, and home health nurse visits. I cancelled PT right away since my mom doesn't understand and refuses to cooperate. Nurse visits lasted 2 months but I had an option to stop at anytime.
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I hope it gets sorted out, Pam.

It’s exhausting dealing with these situations.
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Well Mom got out of the hospital a week ago, and we have been inundated with visits since then,, home nurse, OT, PT, blood draws, going to regular Dr and tomorrow the cardio Dr. Next week was looking better. only OT and HHN,, then today I get a call from the hospital home health SW.. Bottom line, since Mom is listed a DNr they want to come and make sure we "know our options".. And are all on the same page. I explained that Mom is a retired RN and has been DNR for years, and I am in healthcare we are very aware of what the future will bring.. I do thank them for wanting to make me aware that they can meet us at the hospital next time to make it easier for her to come home with appropriate fixtures., but this is all depressing her even more! So no she can;t do a virtual visit,, she is very hard of hearing and can become confused.. so they are coming Mon.. Hubs asking why I just didn't say NO! Because I am somehow afraid they think we are pressuring her ? who knows, but I am tired of this, and just want her comfortable. That is what we will tell SW.. if they can help.. great. If not.. I'll deal with the fall out.
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Jodi,

You’re very welcome.

You spoke the truth. Your brother doesn’t have any idea of what you do.

People get so wrapped up in their own lives that sometimes they become blind to what others are going through.

Sure, I get that he has a busy life, but so do you!

It’s a sacrifice to care for others. I hope that your brother will learn to appreciate your sacrifice and pitch in.
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NHWM ,

I'm trying to muster the energy to call Xfinity to see if (after I send copy of POA) they will allow me to take over the management of my Aunts account.

This is the only task my brother has been responsible for since we moved her out of her home. Unfortunately, he has dropped the ball twice!

I totally understand that he's trying to run a business! At the same time, I don't think he has any idea how many hours I put into keeping my Aunts affairs running smoothly.

I don't want to cause him grief, but I am tired of him inadvertently causing me grief!

As always, Thank you for your support and kindness!!😘
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Boo hoo,

My plumbagos are at the tail end of blooming.

I love the blue flowers. So pretty, but pretty aggressive plant. They have taken over a portion of my backyard.

They are hardy plants. I will need to prune them back soon. They do well year after year.
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Jodi,

It is very hard carrying the load all by yourself.

Sorry that your brother couldn’t help you in your time of need.

Frustration can build during stressful times.
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