My mom is in an assisted living facility and is fixated on 'going home.' When she was first diagnosed with AD, she was the one who wanted the move.

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Wally003, she does see a geriatric doctor. About the stories, it's so bizarre that it's gotten to the point where she actually seeks out tragedy in a story. If you talk about a dog, she'll suspect it was abused. If you ask about an aide or another resident, she'll say that they had a fight with her or told her something negative. I just don't understand it.
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Yes, shad250, she must be incredibly bored. The only problem is that she sits in her room and won't do anything. She has 3 daughters and on most days she has 1 or 2 of us visiting for a couple of hours. She reads but keeps unplugging the TV. She says that someone is unplugging it but I"ve put a note on it that says, "don't unplug" in case the aides were vacuuming or something. She doesn't get it that electricity, food, laundry, and housekeeping are all included in the astronomical price she pays for her care. When we visit, we can hear the karaoke going on outside of her room in the common area. It sounds like so much fun. She won't go. There's a movie theater, there are exercises, someone reads the newspaper to them, and so many other activities. She won't even sit in the common area during the day. She basically just waits for one of us to come over. She says she is bored but won't do anything but sit and wait.
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She is probably bored in the AL
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yes same here! about the stories. stealing and making up stuff. I know they don't happen. something happens...then somehow she twists it and makes it worse or completely different.

does your mom see a geriatric dr ? I feel they are more understanding than just a family practice or general dr./primary
my mom uses a walker because she had a bad fall a couple months ago. I was surprised she actually uses it. she will complain. ~I don't need it.~ I tell her "dr's orders".... I bought her a Rollator walker. other wise the other one she had. she would fold it up and stick it back in closet.
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Thanks, Wally003. I forgot about the bad judgement too. She thinks that she doesn't need her walker and thinks nothing of climbing up on things to get to something. When she first lived in the assisted living last year, they permitted her to have her dog with her. She was waiting outside for me one day (she is now in the locked memory unit) with her dog. When I pulled up in the parking lot, she let his leash go so he could run across the parking lot to me. I took him home to my house that day as I realized that she no longer had good judgement. She either has delusions or lies about things too as she makes up stories about people where she lives. The stories are never complimentary. Always about people sneaking around, stealing or lying.
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then it sounds like you are doing a good job!
my mom will be 89 soon and her memory is about 1 minute long. plus confused. plus bad judgment etc etc. My mom is still very mobile.

sometimes I don't even know how she gets by anymore.

she takes a low anti-depressant prescribed by a geriatric dr. - I think it helps a little. calms her down. she still has lots of problems. (but she's not aware of any. she thinks she just fine...)
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Thank you, Freqflyer. I'm glad you said that because at least it confirms what we usually do. I've already said that there are electrical problems in the house and we have to have them fixed. She gets angry and asks how long it can take. It's almost like she still remembers too much but not enough to understand. I also say that the doctor has to say that she's ok to move back but now I'm faced with a doctor appointment on the 20th and I know that she'll confront her. I've just now finished a letter to the doctor letting her know to expect this and filling her in on my mom's cognitive state.
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Sorry. This is my first post.
She was the one who wanted to find a facility while she still could make the decision. She chose this one and was ok with living there for a while. She's lived there for over a year now and because of being a brittle diabetic, has been hospitalized many times over the past year (8-10 times) followed by stays at several rehabs. She's cognitively much worse now and cries and begs to go home. When we remind her that she can't live alone, she asks to live with her mother and other deceased family members. She's getting angry at us when we redirect her or tell her that for now she has to stay there until they can regulate her sugar and stop her frequent falling. Anyway, we are trying to 'go along' with her that this is temporary but it's getting more and more difficult. She thinks everyone is stealing from her and makes up very detailed fabrications of things. She refuses to socialize and is getting mean and resentful. We just don't know what to do because every visit (there are 3 of us and we visit almost every day.
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MargieJ, when it comes to a person having Alzheimer's/Dementia, when they say they want to "go home", it is usually their childhood home where as a child life was fun and easy.

Best thing to do is play along. Use "theraputic fibs" such as "the house is being fixed, we would need to wait a couple of weeks", or whatever you think Mom would believe at that moment.
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hi you can reply to your own post, so that you can finish what you need to say :)
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