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Moderators, please relocate this post to Questions section.
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Reply to Geaton777
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Remove the spark plugs from his car.
Lose the keys.
Flatten the tires.

Do what YOU need to do to insure the man doesn't kill innocent people while driving around with dementia. It's irrelevant what "he believes" because you know the truth.

Do the right thing.
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Reply to lealonnie1
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Slartibartfast Jan 14, 2026
If they're sharing a car that can be a problem. She can get a small safe to keep the keys in but that won't stop him from harping on the topic. But I agree of course she has to keep him from accidentally killing someone.
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Your husband has anosognosia which means he doesn’t know because he has dementia. He’s never going to know it. He isn’t refusing to believe it.

You are required to disable his car and take his keys away.
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Reply to southernwave
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Are you your husband's PoA? If so, read the document to see what activates your authority. If someone else is his PoA, this person now needs to act. Whoever is his PoA needs to present that paperwork to his doctors (all and any doctor he's recently been to). The PoA can go through his medical portal to send a message to his doctor requesting he be cognitively tested. The PoA needs to accompany him to such an exam and stay in the room the entire time (and your husband won't like it but make up a reason to stay in). Then request the doctor write a letter on clinic letterhead with the diagnosis of cognitive impairment sufficient to require the ongoing intervention of his PoA.

You can also discretely ask his primary doctor to write an order to the OT deptartment for a virtual driving assessment. They will give him a more comprehensive MoCA test for his executive function (judgment) and also a physical reaction test. My 94-yr old Mom failed both and then it was the OT's job to break the news that she failed and it would be reported to the Dept of Public Safety who would then send her a letter of license cancellation. This is how I got my Mom to stop driving.

In the meantime you will need to physically hide the keys (both sets) on your person, or disable/remove the car. Tell a therapeutic fib that it is in the shop for very expensive repair -- or whatever narrative he will accept. Do not let him drive. My Uncle caused his own wife to die in an accident he himself caused because his children didn't stop him from driving.
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This sounds like an ad for a business used to recruit clients. First consultation is free? Your business logo is also visible on the post. This refers to the first post which appears to have been deleted. They were answering the question on driving and appeared to be recruiting for their paid services.
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Daughterof1930 Jan 14, 2026
It’s been reported for removal
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Don’t expect your husband to see or understand his condition. He will not, he’s lost that ability, along with being able to make sound decisions. It’s on you to be the rational one now. Discussing his dementia with him leads only to frustration for you both. You must see to it that he doesn’t drive again, the risk is too great. Disable the car, or move it to another location he doesn’t know about, whatever it takes. You will find yourself often using what’s called therapeutic fibs, in other words, lies told to him in his best interests to appease him and give you some peace
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This situation is very common in dementia. Your husband may truly be unable to recognize his condition, and this is a symptom of the illness, not stubbornness or denial. it’s a symptom of the disease itself, called anosognosia. So do not put in more time trying to convince him, as it may cause him more conflict. Focus on safety, and shift responsibility to the doctor or rules when possible. It’s important to seek support as well.
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