My boyfriend stays in a house he built in a non profit organization, and takes care of an elderly man there. He is being accused of fraud. - AgingCare.com

My boyfriend stays in a house he built in a non profit organization, and takes care of an elderly man there. He is being accused of fraud.

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A lady came from adult protective services and right off the bat was accusing my boyfriend of fraud that someone called and made a report on him, he takes care of this elderly man because his family was never around or would help him so we started helping him my boyfriend does everything for him and there friends for a long long time he even wanted my boyfriend to be his power of attorney and he's in his right state of mind and the power of attorney was notorized and filed. My boyfriend doesn't handle any of this man's money and he takes him to pay his bills, I feel real bad for my boyfriend cause this lady said a lot of bad accusations to someone she has never met and when I heard her tell the old man she thinks we're on drugs that pi**ed me off she doesn't know me and im not part of whatever is going on, I told her off , to have someone that suppose to be professional be so wrong, I don't even take over the counter drugs. The thing is I feel sorry for these caregivers who put there own lives aside to help somebody's else's parent so they can live a life get put in a terrible position because of some upset sibling not getting there way there's nothing in this for my boyfriend and the man he takes care of wouldn't be here today if it wasn't for him. I know that there is elder abuse out there. I think taking care of someone and giving your life up for them should get much more pay than just $12 an hour, a nurse can come out for a half hour and take home 300.00, I like to do something to change that system and give more help to these caregivers

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Becky, I agree that there are good Social Workers out there and because they are, they probably burn out quickly. But in my experience, the ones I have been around don't ooze confidence. When Mom went to Daycare I was asked about accessibility to my home. What would I do if Mom became wheelchair bound. Answer, she would have to go to an AL Its a split level, the lowest level being half underground. It is not wheelchair accessible and will never be. She could not understand why a ramp could not be put out Moms door. Because the steps go down to the door. Front door was null and void because its six steps up from Moms room. She still said it could be done. At the NH they switched Moms room. They wanted to put her in front of an a/c unit. I requested that she not be put there because she was not used to a/c. She got cold easily. The next day I found her bed in front of the a/c. I went to the SW, could not tell me why my request was not made. Just put the vents aiming up. I asked why it was so cold in there and was told that the woman on the other side of the room liked it cold. So put her next to the a/c unit.  They want you to fit in their little box not try to find a resolution that would work for the client.  When I get a good SW, CNA or nurse I make sure their supervisor is aware that they r doing a good job.  In this day and age its hard to find someone who does.
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Becky04473- thanks for adding this. I had a dear friend who was a social worker for many years - including home visits and many dangerous situations and people. I used to worry about her so much. She told me herself that many of her clients should not be out in the community - but there was nothing she could do. She worked very hard, but was not empowered to do the job as it needed to be. Did my best to provide support, but the problems were many and it wasn't her fault. Anyway, my issue was with my LPN filing a frivolous report on me and I had no way to know if anyone would believe her. My assumption is that they would believe her and I'd charged with a crime. This LPN was not afraid to lie and I'm sure she knew how to write the report so that it looked good. My hope was that the APS nonsense-detectors would go off when they saw her name on something, but yet she seemed VERY famililar with APS, so I'm sure she knew who to give the report to where it would get attention. I didn't want to spend my time and resources as well as APS time/resources trying to sort out truth from fiction.
Didn't want to have my name dragged through the mud. Meanwhile, who is caring for Mom while this investigation is happening? I'm sure I would not be allowed to do so if I were under investigation & there was NO ONE to step in if I were removed. Did my dear LPN stop to think about that?? I should have asked her what the plan was..... Oh yes, I'm SURE she had something in place for Mom's continuity of care - yeah, right!! It was those kinds of issues and fears I had.
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Well when I said about the nurse she might of been from social serviced, but my boyfriend ask her what she got for coming out here and she did say 300, but I'm sure it goes to Social services and her. The nurse and the old man social working told my boyfriend that his done a good job and if they needed them to be a witness on his behalf they would, and I sure appreciate all the feedback weather it's good or bad I know I'm not alone.
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Hi again , no aps did no asking just accusing and tell the old man , but he knows where not on drugs, and maybe I shouldn't of said anything to her but she brought me into it and i don't work for him but I felt how dare she , if she would if talk to me she'd know, the thing is I don't take or even borrow money, never do drugs, I raised a daughter who in San Fran state college, I felt that's my integrity she's messing with, my boyfriend's not on no bank accounts, he even spends his own money to get him dinner or lunch, and the old man told that lady if there was anyone that he wanted to take care of him it would be my boyfriend
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In defense of Social Workers:

My step DIL has been a Social worker for over 25+ years. She has worked for both Adult Protective Services and Child Protective Services. She is professional and very concerned about the cases she investigates and handles. She is currently on disability leave. She was assaulted and thrown off a second story porch by a couple who said she was harassing them. Her hip was broken, pelvis shattered and leg broke in two places. The couple were subsequently found to be using drugs and also found to be methamphetamine cookers. They were financially exploiting her elderly grandfather and had two children who were found to be neglected and malnourished. She has had multiple surgeries and months of rehab. She will never be able to walk normally or without support. 

My ex is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker for the State of Maine and then for West Virginia Adult Protective Services. Even at his level of licensing he has never made more than $45,000. He has 20+ years experience.Never paid overtime for a 60+ hour week. He and his co-workers have a thankless job and many times put in physical danger because of the job they do. My ex was shot in a shootout between two parents and the State Police because my ex had a court order to remove the child from the parents who were documented child sex offenders. He was physically assaulted by a 28yr old man when he came to do a home check on an elderly woman. Social workers are routinely lied about in court and in the community. My ex’s primary job was going with law enforcement to remove vulnerable adults and children from situations that had already been adjudicated by a court of law and the persons found guilty. 

For every unfounded accusations there are an equal number that are proven true. Every complaint has to be investigated. 
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Thanks to countrymouse for the thoughts and support. I have found this forum to be a good place. I do want to clarify that I AM concerned about the next family my LPN gets. I DID try to move my complaint up the chain at the person's employer but the level of incompetence only increased the higher up I went. Sounds crazy, but it's true. I would then need to take my complaint outside to someone else - which I looked into doing. I sought advice first (I'd hope others would do this also) since I still needed protecting myself. Some possible solutions:

1. Proactively call APS myself. Was advised not to do this because it would raise more red flags than one could count and I would no doubt be investigated further.

2. Contact the hospital who is the parent company for this in-home agency. Was advised not to do this either because LPN would retaliate and ADD whatever details she felt were needed. I was dealing with someone who already fabricated that the house had an odor - what other details would she add? I won't lie. Her story could get bigger by the minute since she already lied once.

3. Contact our state nursing board. Was also advised not to do this because nurses are allowed to call APS if they feel it's needed.

Countrymouse, you mentioned that I should list my claims which can be substantiated. I completely agree with this. I have no proof is the problem. I can't prove the conversations I had with her even took place at ALL - let alone I can't prove the lies, threats, etc. I don't have proof - which is a hallmark of this type of bully - they don't leave a trail behind them. Just like so many of the harassment/bullying/conduct cases in the news these past few months, there's rarely any PROOF - but that does not mean it's all nonsense. It would have been my word against hers - and she's not afraid to lie. That type keeps making stuff up until they achieve their goal. Sad. Not sure why she picked me. Should I have to go through an investigation to prove she's lying? No. And, even if an investigation proved she was lying/exaggerating or being mean, it would not result in disciplinary for her because nurses are allowed to call APS, Period.

So.. where did that leave me? It left me just as vulnerable as I was previously. The most which would have happened to LPN was that she would have been removed from OUR case and the whole thing would have been classified as a "misunderstanding." Any disciplinary records within the company would have been private. They could have told me they fired her & I'd never have known if they did or not. Plus, LPN would just go work somewhere else. People hate this idea... but it happens all the time. Bad ones get shuffled around.

Since she had already been removed from our case and that was the most I could have hoped for anyway, I dropped it.

I had no evidence which would have changed anything for the next family who got her.

Joann29 had an idea that I could have called the insurance company - I agree that might have helped. That is one this I did not think of. But, would it truly have prevented LPN from bullying another family? Not sure.
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One thing to keep in mind when there is outside healthcare coming into your home is just that its your home. These people are not to come into a clients home and be overbearing. They are there to do a job. They can suggest but not demand. That is not their job. I worked in the office of a Visiting Nurse Assoc. and my boss drummed this into our nurses all the time. Since you got nowhere with the RN in charge, calling your insurance company may have helped. I called BC about a billing dept and she called them and told them to correct the problem or they'd be fined.
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OverTheEdge, that's *exactly* the point, exactly what makes me grind my teeth with frustration.

Overbearing, nasty-minded little Hitlers like that LPN - I can't think of a polite way to put it, basically people who are right up themselves - they are underpaid and under appreciated, and their response to that is to do the minimum they can possibly get away with and to exercise what little power they do have by bullying others.

But here's the thing. Have a little faith in the ability of an averagely good social worker (there are grim exceptions, but they are not as common as the papers would have you believe) to distinguish between grounds for concern and someone out to make trouble.

Because if the LPN makes what you did, genuinely, perceive as a threat, and your response is "be my guest..."

Well, then it's not really much of a threat, is it.

You say "it's insulting to be accused." It can be, yes. But the accusation has already happened, and it's come from someone who frankly could do with a little extra inspection and supervision herself. What remains is the question "is the accusation justified?"; and to repeat: a question is not an accusation.

You'd have thought, just mulling it over, that APS might do well to engage better with their communities so that people stop thinking of them as the local Stasi and are quicker to seek their help before situations have become crises (or worse).

Then you say you fear for the next family this woman lands on. Well. Not much, you don't, do you? If you really did, you would make a formal complaint. Not a complaint about your fear of being reported to APS. A complaint about unprofessionalism that you witnessed and can substantiate.

APS are there to help, protect and support people. If people don't use them properly, they can't do their job properly; and you can hardly blame them for that.
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I had a scary situation where I was threatened with APS. We had a rude, obnoxious, empowered bully of an LPN assigned to us for "home care" - and I do use that term loosely. Pretty much everyone who came out from this agency (therapists, social work, - all of them) were poor quality and quite arrogant at the same time. I know none of them were making $300 for a half hour, but I understand why ladana made that statement because I'm sure all these people were making a pretty penny and they did essentially no discernable work. Unfortunately, Mom did not exactly thrive in the home environment and I think all of us agreed on that. Unfortunately, LPN didn't seem to get it that just because a person's condition changes in a way we don't like... it does not mean there is any abuse/neglect. LPN threatened me with APS. Yes, it WAS a threat. It scared me so much that I still to this very day worry they will show up at my door - and Mom's been in a facility for a while now.  LPN was also falsely claiming the house smelled bad & all those little things which painted the picture she wanted. Why would she do this? Because she can. She was of that "power" type of personality. Period. Meanwhile, I have a life and reputation to maintain and to have that threatened by anyone is very serious. I reported LPN to the RN who oversees her & RN told me "I'm too busy running my butt off to worry about that." Would have been nice to get rid of all of them, but this is what Mom's insurance covered & I feared that switching would be even worse.

Some people said to me "just let APS come out and see" and I do see the logic there, but it's insulting to be accused & somewhat more insulting to then have to spend time and resources defending myself when I should be caring for Mom.

I did have two reputable character witnesses step in on my behalf. Suddenly the RN who was "too busy" found the time to take power-trip LPN off of our Mom's case. I haven't heard anything from APS. It's been a while, but it still bothers me like i'm traumatized or something. I probably think about it every day to one degree or another. It was very unnerving. I've never before been accused of a serious crime & I wasn't sure how I should feel. Regarding the home care agency, we tried to elevate our complaint up the chain at the agency because we felt LPN was possibly in need of some retraining or mentoring since her job seems to have inflated her ego a little much. However, this agency was so disorganized that there wasn't much of a chain of command for us to appeal to. I should throw in that this agency was loosely affiliated with a major hospital system in my area and they were still this bad. I could have always pushed my complaint further, but I was so afraid of them that I stopped. It kind of turned into a "I'll leave you alone if you leave me alone" type of thing. I fear for the next family that LPN does this to.
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Thank you for your comments, to answer some of your questions, it seems that the elderly man's grandson was probably behind the lady coming out because he wanted to move in to his grandfather and grow marijuana and sell it, true story, but the old man said no way, he did try to move in and he had put all his grandfather's stuff out in the rain so he could have room for his and my boyfriend brought it back in and made his grandson leave,and he wasn't happy that he had to go. And also my boyfriend gets paid from himecare people and they only give him 57 hour a month,, but my boyfriend is there for him 24/7, my boyfriend doesn't get money from the old man. And I still think the lady that came out should of talk to us and not down on us , and she was accusing she should of been more professional, she didn't have a leg to stand, cause none of it is true, I see how my boyfriend takes care of this man, and anyone who takes care of someone knows how challenging it can be these care givers are friends , listeners, counselors,cookers ,cleaner and gardener all in one, and really don't get a break I see this it's a hard job and rarely get a thank you from anyone, and I hope that if I ever need help that it will be like what I see here, and I still think the systems need to be change and go after the ones that give false imformation
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