Sooooo... I am being re-reminded out a lot of people think of themselves as "experts" about other people's health issues. I was just told the other day from an acquaintance about how our aging family member was "just like" her grandfather who had only two years left to live (this was after I opened up to her about our concerns about our family—keep in mind I really didn't give her details). Then she told me we should move our aging family members in with us and care for them both (FIL has hallucinations and memory problems and does not want to even leave his home—and we have a small child so no....). I am trying to keep in mind she meant well and was trying to be helpful, but when people say these kind of things (no matter how good their intentions are) I am reminded why older family members can have strong justification for keeping their declining health a secret.