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We feel mother was killed by Hospice. Hospice came in and said we want to help and make her comfortable, read the bible, do her nails, get her a better mattress, sing to her. All of these things were just to get her started on morphine and kill her. If you are truly dying and in pain hospice is good but if you are just old and sick they will kill you. They would always give her morphine and say oh she said she was in pain, when we ask our mother she said she had no pain. We told the nursing home to stop the hospice because she couldn't breath because of the morphine and that night hospice killed her we believe with the overdose of morphine. People please listen it is all about the money and they want all the old people dead and get Hospice to do it.

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Madison, my heartfelt sympathy to you and your family.

If you really believe this was murder, did you call in law enforcement?

Please note when it is our time to die, we will go on the same time table with or without hospice. It all depends on if you want to die in terrible pain, or die peacefully. Both my parents chose the peaceful route, and I am glad they did.

Too bad you didn't find this website earlier, otherwise we could have guided you with what to expect during this time of transiting for your mother. I just found it unusual that you posted here after-the-fact.
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janiel you should have provided details and explained what you were asking. If you don’t, then of course people will ask questions.
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i believe hospice killed my mother too . actually i believe my 3 sisters purposely, intentionally and legally killed my mother with the help of hospice . i asked a question two days ago . instead of an answer, i got asked questions! my question was .. what would happen if they stopped giving you food .. stopped giving your medication to you .. and gave you morphine ..? the answer is simple . a HORRIBLE yet simple answer . i wish to God id have never heard of hospice . my mother would still be here .
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Dana, I've read stories like yours too often here on the forum and I'm always confused about why the family agrees to bringing in Hospice if they don't feel their loved one is palliative. Do you mind sharing your reasoning - is it simply because of the promise of funded assistance that wouldn't be available otherwise?
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I am so sorry you went through that with hospice.
You are not the only one. I almost did too with my mother.

You no longer need a life expectancy of six months to get hospice.
My mother received it based on the number of times that she had been in the hospital for recurrent UTI's and on an overall decline in function; last year she could walk with a walker and now she is weaker and basically bedbound. But she is still in the MCI range, not yet vascular dementia, and no Alzheimer's.

She got another UTI and it was resistant to oral antibiotics. Hospice said to not take her to the hospital. When she hallucinated and got very confused they said it was because dementia was rapidly progressing, although she had cognitive symptoms with UTIs before, as so many elderly.

Hospice told me to give her morphine and ativan and haldol for her anxiety and refused to approve IV antibiotics, which she has needed before. I could not stand to see her suffer like that and took her to the ER anyway.

The hospice nurse showed up at the hospital to tell them that she was on hospice, at which point I took her off hospice. She was treated for the UTI and after 24 hours on IV antibiotics, her mind had cleared.

Hospice can be wonderful for those who are dying of terminal cancer or have advanced dementia. Even then I don't think they really are much help; they just say give them morphine and expect the family caregiver to do everything, including being alone with a dying parent.

I know some people have had good experiences with hospice, and the quality of hospice companies does vary, but if I had listened to them, my mother would be dead now from sepsis and dehydration.

It's important that others know the downsides as well as the positives of hospice. I think it's being oversold because it's a lot cheaper for Medicare to have them die at home than treat them in a hospital.
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Madison, what was your mother's medical issues? I see that your only posts on this site are related to your objections about hospice. And your mom passed two years ago? Are you here to rile people up?
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I am speaking for me and me only. My husband died a slow agonizing death, he had cancer and a brain tumor. I prayed that someone would take him out of his pain and suffering, no one did. Under the same circumstances, I would like to be overdosed. If I get real sick, I am going to establish residency in a right to die state.
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I hear you loud and clear. I respect your right to voice how you feel. Hospice can be the best experience and then there are some that might have a not so good one. It's just so hard to watch someone pass on. I am not sure you were there during, but my guess is that your dear Mama knows you did the best you could. Keeping talking with people, friends and family as much as you need to and grief counseling. Everyone is different. But in the end-you did the best you could.
I hope you will be gentle with yourself. Feel what you feel. Praying for you to have peace. Hugs
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I agree, with you, Madison 4252000, your right your mother was murdered! Sorry for your lose. they probably thought that you were going to tell on them at the time. if she was NOT dying at the time, and they put her on hospice and someone found out, they might have went to jail. So I guess they were thinking if they just go ahead and give her morphine ,it would be over and no one would investigate her death.
Where I live they think spouses can just put another spouse into hospice without them even knowing and without them even dying and forge there name.
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I doubt if Hospice themselves read the bible, did her nails and sang to her. That was probably volunteers that come and sit with patients. Hospice staff is not there 24/7. Not even with home hospice. Nurse comes 2/3x a week. Aide every few days to bathe. So, the NH staff probably gave the morphine and like said, they can only give what the doctor orders. Even if the patient says they r not in pain, their BP shows they are.

As said, hospice has grief counseling. You may want to call them.
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My mom was on hospice and they never gave her morphine. She took hydrocodone and tramadol for pain but that was it. We had a wonderful hospice team. My mother passed away five days ago.
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I am sorry for your loss. It is hard to see a LO suffer. My mother was in the hospital with terminal cancer and the doctors asked my sister and I if we would like them to give mom morphine to make her comfortable. She had not used any thing for pain durring her illness. We said no because we both worked in the medical field and we knew what that meant. Mom wanted to go on her own. Not with help. My father had hospice and we had the same option. We decided morphine was best for him. So it depends on the situation and how the family feels. It is a hard decision either way. My mother was 48 and my father was 58 when they passed. Not old by any means. Prayers for you.
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To qualify for hospice one must (usually) have a terminal illness where death is imminent.

What was your mother’s diagnosis? Can you provide more details?

What was your understanding of what hospice services are for?

I understand you are grief stricken now. It’s very hard to lose your mother.

I suggest you give yourself some time to process her death. Get through her funeral, etc. In time you may feel differently about what occurred. Hopefully you will come to peace and more comfortable with your decision to elect for hospice care.

Don’t feel guilty about doing the best you can in an inevitable scenario. We all pass away one day. I don’t know your mother’s specific diagnosis. It does appear from your description that she was not suffering in the end.
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I'm sorry for the loss of your mother. I'm glad that she was able to have pain relief though. Did they explain to you that the morphine administered is not sufficient to cause a person's death? And, if the Hospice team was motivated by money, they would not be ending lives, but, extending them, since, their money stops upon the patient's death. They have no vested interest in ending anyone's life.
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Madison - if your late mom was on hospice as a Medicare benefit, please please see if you as her surviving family can get grief counseling. You may find it especially beneficial to find a way to come to terms with her passing.

My mom was in a NH and fell forward - pulling her wheelchair behind her by the seat - and shattered her hip. Not her first fall but finally the one that made her bedfast. And bedfast she was for 18 l...o...n...g long months and went onto hospice at the NH. Each month getting tiny & tinier, it was kinda like watching a self mummification. And she was a petite lady to start with. For whatever reason she just flat wasn’t ready to die. Her morphine and other meds varied over time. If there was any way to up her morphine dose given by hospice so she could go to Her own “that eventuality”, I gladly would have signed off on this to happen. But that is absolutely not how hospice or health care works. It was your mom’s time & it’s hard for you to reconcile which is understandable.

Really grief counseling may be beneficial for you. Sorry for your loss
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Morphine *slows* respiration, but it is used because slower breathing is deeper breathing and the person gets more oxygen altogether. Honestly, I promise you. I found this out because I too was outraged when my mother's GP first suggested it and I hardly gave the poor woman a chance to explain. But I'm glad I did.

In the last days of her life, my mother was able to tell me whether or not she wanted her morphine and as it turned out she needed very little, only one or two doses over several days, to get her through rough patches.

Your mother's hospice team should ideally have been asking her first - are you sure they didn't? But in any case, the reason your mother was able to reassure you, the family, that she wasn't in any pain is that she was given morphine. Don't you agree that her being pain free was the most important thing?

I am so sorry that you are suffering this terrible anxiety about your mother's last days. Have you talked to anyone at the Nursing Home?
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I'm sorry for your loss and the bitter feelings you carry because of it. This is a discussion that has been covered again and again on AgingCare, but I doubt you are open to hearing that it is impossible to OD on the prescribed dose of morphine and that the amounts used are vigorously scrutinized, or that opiates can actually help breathing, or that killing off people in order to make money makes no sense because they are paid by the day, so surely prolonging suffering would pay better.
I don't know what actually happened to your dear mother but I do sympathize with your loss. I will share that my mother also died within minutes of receiving her last injection of Dilaudid so I can understand why it may seem that was the cause, I was just grateful she was doped out of her mind and not suffering.
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