Mums a right little sneak!!!


GO FIGURE! ive known my mum puts on an act for years now BUT this was too much and although sad quite "funny".

We had visitors yesterday very rare anywhoo my aunt and cousin came and we went for a nice lunch.

When i got up mum was up,dressed,makeup,hair done and cleaned the bathroom and the front room!

Was quite pleasant and chirpy my cousin commented that he found it hard to believe she had "dementia" for a moment she had me convinced aswell???? yes a moment!

WELL they had not even left five minutes when she chucked all her clothes off put on her smelly pjs sat in the chair and was almost asleep and demanded i make her a cup of tea! I said NO you are quite capable of making your own tea now as you seemed quite "perky" earlier or was that an act? She screamed at me and said in quite an aggressive way "of course its a bloody act and now im tired so make me a cup of tea do you think its easy to be perky?"

Well you could have knocked me down with a feather! So she actually admitted to putting on an act??

It made me realise that she is taking the piss out of me at times and she can do alot more than she pretends!!!

I am still in shock!

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Thanks guys im just shocked that she admitted it to me! My sister is coming home in July for a week I just hope as usual that mum throws one of her "tantrums" as my sister has never seen this side of her and is in denial about her dementia I long for the day when mum can no longer hide this from family so they can finally wake up to what im going through! Not that they will care but up until now mum hasnt been on her "bad behaviour" when the family are around and they dont spend enough time with her to see just how bad it can be!

It is so common there is a name for it -- as Eyerishlass says, it is "showtiming." Try to enjoy the good behavior while it lasts, but don't expect it to last long and also realize that as the dementia progresses she won't be able to continue to put on a good act. This is just part and parcel of dementia. She can't help it.

Many elderly people with dementia put on an act, or "showtime". I have a patient right now in a NH and when I'm there she's lucid (for the most part), pleasant, and appropriate. But when I read the Nurse's Notes and the Caregiver Notes I see that she puts on a show for me as she can get downright mean and nasty with her caregivers and staff from the NH.

I'm sure it's exhausting pretending to be something you're not for several hours. Showtiming requires much concentration, memorization, and acting nice and sweet. How exhausting would it be for us to behave as if we had dementia for 3 or 4 hours!

I hope your mom got her own tea. ;-)

I don't have to deal with dementia - After reading so many posts from you all and what you deal with - I just don't know how you do it. I only know that the ONLY person with dementia that I would EVER try to cope with would be my hubby or child. If my MIL loses her marbles - someone else will have to care for her. I know already that I am not cut out for dementia care. BLESS ALL OF YOU who are caring for a difficult person. Pat yourself on the back if no one else does :0)

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