My mother has been very active and mobile until about 1 year ago. Her memory is bad; she can hardly walk because of swelling in her legs and ankles. She is very mean to my father and says very hurtful things. I took her to her Dr. and he said 'there is no set testing for dementia'. SO, what do we do now? My dad is at his witts end and she has been saying very hurtful things and now helping in any way with household work or cooking. She basically just sits.